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That’s all he needs to know.
I could be seriously fucked.
So, I’ve been holed up in my room, afraid to leave even for a meal, should I run into him. I’m not making a sound, because should he come by wanting to talk to me, I want him to think I’m not in. Of course, I can’t avoid him forever, just until I can form a plan.
Problem is, I have no plan. I’m not sure I will. Ever. He saw me, plain and simple, and if he wants to fuck me over, he can.
And he knows John and his friends are off to seminary. Is that even worse in his mind? Does he think I’m corrupting our next generation of holy men, like some sort of Jezebel?
And how do I feel about this? The touche of the guys—their lips, hands, and every other body part that rubbed up against mine—was amazing. I didn’t twist their arms. Not at all. They wanted me just as much as I wanted them.
Still do, to be honest.
The plan. I must focus on the plan. I want to bring up my calculus grade, plain and simple. I don’t think that’s too much to ask of myself. I will get the help I need, and if I have a little fun along the way, so be it. Good for me.
Because being with these guys is about the closest to holy that I’ve ever felt.
On the way to meet them at the library, since we’re not even supposed to study in each other’s rooms, I wrack my brains for someone to discuss my predicament with. I can’t think of a soul. Not even my BFF, who’s not around much lately anyway, thanks to all the hours she’s working as a telemarketer.
I’m swinging in the wind here, all by myself. Not a soul in sight to support me through this shit.
“Hi guys,” I say as I slide into the private study room they managed to reserve.
There’s a lot of competition for these soundproof rooms. They’re simple with just a table and some chairs, and glass walls all the way around because, of course, the school can’t let students mix in complete privacy.
God knows what might happen.
Actually, I know. And it’s pretty damn hot.
I settle in, dragging my giant calc book out of my backpack, along with my notebook and reams of scrap paper for practice.
Thomas leans back in his chair with a naughty smile he’s trying to contain, his dark eyes chewing on me. At least that’s what it feels like. In a good way. “Okay, Rose, we have a plan. We’re thinking you need a basic review of algebra. That’s why you are struggling with calc, because your algebra is not solid enough.”
Oh my God. Calculus is bad enough, but now I have to think about algebra too?
Matthew laughs. “You look like you are about to vomit, Rose. You need the trash can?” he asks, passing it to me.
“Very funny,” I say, doing my best to sound offended. “Algebra, huh? You really know how to spoil a girl’s day, don’t you?”
John leans over the table toward me, and it’s all I can do not to stare at his luscious lips. “Once you get this stuff down, Rose, it actually becomes easy. Believe me. I know what I’m talking about.”
I throw my hands up. “You guys are in charge. I have to trust you know what you’re doing.”
What other choice do I have?
A quick and relatively painless two hours later, the four of us are crossing campus to get back to the dorm. I’m exhausted and worn out, but also thrilled that the guys’ quick brain dump of algebra didn’t kill me. In fact, it came together nicely for me, and I handled the problems they gave me with no trouble.
“You know guys, I just want to thank you. Not only did this algebra review really click for me, but it also helped my confidence. That’s probably the best thing of all,” I say.
John drops an arm around my shoulders. Public affection is generally frowned upon here, no big surprise, but it’s dark out and there are few people walking around at this hour.
Which gives me an idea.
I stop in my tracks, so the guys do too. “Hey, what do you say to checking out the botanical garden over there?” I ask.
The botanical garden. One of the shining stars of the university, the first place new students visit, and the headquarters for more selfies than anyone could ever count. It’s freaking gorgeous, full of lush plantings and a rotating collection of flowers that ensures something blooms pretty much year-round.
It’s also filled with maze-like paths, and it’s dark and completely empty right now.
