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“Good girl. Now let’s get you dressed because I need a shower.” I pull her sweatshirt over her head, not bothering with the bra since we’re just going down the hall. I also don’t bother with her panties and just pull her shorts on as she jumps down from the counter. When she looks away, I tuck her panties into my pocket because no matter how gentleman-like I was just now, I’m still a dirty bastard.
“What are you gonna think about during your shower?” she asks teasingly.
I grip her ass as we walk out of the room. “You know exactly what I’m gonna think about. Your sweet ass pussy.”
CHAPTERTWENTY-SIX
NAVY
Icouldn’t spend last night with Rigger because he had “club business” he refused to tell me about. All I know is he didn’t come to bed until well after two in the morning, and when I woke up this morning, his knuckles were split open, dried blood crusted across them.
Not wanting to wake him, I quietly got ready for work.
Now it’s nearly noon, and I can’t tell you what I’ve done today. My thoughts have ping-ponged between wondering what room he’ll take me to tonight and what happened to him last night.
I try to answer emails and log timesheets, but I can’t get it together. After Rigger gave me my first orgasm, it’s like my brain went to mush. All I can think about is when he’ll do it again. I was a little disappointed that things didn’t go as far as I thought, but as Rigger softly snored next to me later that night, I had time to process. I was thankful for the care he was putting into my sexual awakening.
Honestly, what kind of man would jump through this many hoops for a piece of ass?It’s because he doesn’t want just your ass, dummy. He wants all of you.
That thought gives me pause because, in my head, I’m still not staying in Reno. No how, no way. I love Rigger, but I can’t give him all of me with that monster breathing the same air I am. It’s not possible, and I’ll never be able to fully relax.
He refuses to talk about it whenever I mention the fact that he could come with me and Mom. Reno is where his brothers are—where his family is—and abandoning them is not something he’ll even consider. I get it; I just wish I meant more to him than the Sons do.
Thinking about my plan has me realizing I haven’t spoken to Mom this week, so I pull out my cell and dial her up. Something between us changed the day Rigger rescued me. It put space there that I don’t know if we’ll ever get over. And I’m not talking physical space, although there’s that too because no chance in hell Rigger will let me go see her. Not that I want to, anyway.
“Hey, honey,” Mom answers with fake cheerfulness. “How are you?”
“Hey, Mom. Just wanted to check in.”
“I’m fine. Just putting dinner in the crockpot.”
“What are you making?” I ask.
We haven’t spoken about what happened, and maybe it’s for the best. Because I’ll never forget the way I screamed for help only to be met with silence.
“Some ranch chicken thing I saw on TV.”
“Sounds good. Are you safe?” It’s a dumb question. She’ll never be safe living in that house.
“I’m. . . well, you know.” She laughs humorlessly. “I’m not dead.”
“Mom.”
“I’m being dramatic. I’m fine. Actually, your stepfather has been quite busy lately. I think he’s spending time with those men, doing whatever it is they’re having him do.”
“Kill people,” I say, knowing she doesn’t like to hear it. “He kills people to pay off gambling debts. Human beings with families and lives. All dead because of Ray.”
“We both know what he does,” she bites out. “There’s no reason to spell it out.”
I sigh, my frustration growing. Danielle told me to expect this. I’m not hiding behind loyalties or stuffing my feelings deep down anymore. I’m talking about them, making them real, and in doing that, my tolerance for her bullshit is the ground.
“We need to talk about it because that’s what’s really happening. Don’t you see?”
“I see just fine, Vivi.”
I wince at the use of my childhood nickname. No one calls me that anymore. It almost feels like a separate entity. Danielle told me it’s a coping mechanism.
“Do you want to come here? Maybe stay a couple nights and get a break?” I offer.
