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“Care to share with the rest of us, Dee?” Logan levels his gaze on Dana, his patience clearly wearing thin.
Jessa answers for her friend. Always the protector, she attempts to maintain an indifferent tone, but I detect a slight shake in her voice. She’s scared.
Standing directly behind her, Tex tries to shut her down with sarcasm, but she’s not having any of it. As soon as his words leave his mouth, Jessa jerks her elbow up, hitting Tex square in the nose. Judging by how fast his head snaps back, she made a solid connection, and he buckles to the ground behind her.
A surge of pride bursts through me, but I keep my expression cold as I reach around to snap a photo of him sprawled out on the lawn. Then I shake my head in disbelief. We’re going to need to have a group discussion about underestimating our opponents and letting our guard down, or I might lose one of these guys one day.
Distracted by my own thoughts, I catch the end of Logan telling our men to put the women in a different vehicle from ours, and I lose what was left of my composure at the thought of being away from Jessa, even for the four-hour drive back to our compound.
“She stays with us, Jekyll.” Pointing my finger in claim at Jessa, I square myself on Logan. I won’t entertain the slightest chance I could lose her again.
“No. They drive back in the van with the team.” Logan’s jaw is clenched. I know he doesn’t want to have this discussion here, but I’m not letting her go, so it’s going to happen.
Then I notice the guys waiting. This has never happened to us before. He and I have never disagreed on protocol. We’ve always worked together toward what is best for the mission.
Then I realize I’m not thinking about the mission.
I’m thinking about her, and Logan knows it too. He’s trying to give me the chance to fall in line and get my head back in the game in front of our team.
I make one last attempt to have her in the same vehicle with me, but Logan shuts it down. He ends our conversation with, “You heard me. Move out.”
As we follow everyone into the front yard, I look over to the farmhouse. Some of our team are still carrying out bags and equipment, but by the looks of the computer and laptop they recovered, we won’t be getting any information that way.
Back in the SUV, Grey and Eagle are silent. Grey has his eyes on the road; he knows where we’re going. Eagle is packing up his bag in the front seat. We have at least a few hours until we are back on our own turf.
“We’re heading back to camp on radio silence. Until we can assess the situation, I don’t want any information to get out. Notify the rest of the team, and turn on some music, Grey.” Logan’s curt command breaks the silence.
“What do you want to hear, boss?” The moment the words are out, Grey’s shoulders tense up, and I know he regrets asking.
“I don’t give a fuck. Just turn it on. You can even play some of that pop shit you like,” Logan barks, and Grey starts pressing buttons as I settle back into my seat and wait.
Taking a deep sigh, Logan adjusts himself in his seat and looks out the window for a long minute.
I take the pause to gather my thoughts. This was an unexpected turn of events, and if Logan loves anything, it’s control.
Our two vehicles drive off the property and onto the dirt road, followed by the rest of our team in their own units. I keep my eyes forward, watching the van in front of us, the one that’s carrying Jessa back to our base.
Music beats through the speakers, but I’m barely here.
Before I allow myself to drown in thoughts of her, Logan breaks the silence between us.
“Mind telling me where your head is at, Jack?”
Truth be told, my head is in the vehicle in front of us, and we both know it.
I shrug. “Target acquired. Nothing to talk about.” My focus stays on the van, which is now kicking up rocks.
He’s not buying it. He turns toward me and leans back as though I slapped him. “Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?” The guys in the front seat exchange side glances at his tone. “The only piece of ass you’ve ever mentioned is in that van. Don’t act like it’s nothing. I know all about yournothing—I knoweverything, Jack.” His attempt at asserting dominance is beginning to grate on my nerves, but I know he’s right.
This isn’t about the mission.
I can’t even see the mission anymore.
In our silence, I take a moment to look down before I engage with Logan, and that’s when I see it. I’m wringing my hands together, like a junkie waiting for his next fix. I’m on edge, and I’m wired. My tells are all out in the open, and I can’t control myself.
The only way out of this conversation is honesty. I owe it to Logan. He’s been there for me for ten years. I’ve told him everything. I’m thinking with every part of my body right now except my brain, and I need to sort this shit out before we get to our destination and I see her again.
“Fine. Yes. It’s Jessa. I don’t know what the fuck to do. She was supposed to be dead. I got over her. I was—”
