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“Are you sure you’ll be okay for the weekend?” she asks me, looking worried.
“We’ll make do,” I assure her. “Summer will still come during the days and Emily can take over at nights.”
“Do you think Summer could spend the weekend?” She pushes her glasses up her nose and looks at me hopefully.
“It’s still too early to decide. I mean, she hasn’t even been here a full week and you’re ready to relinquish Ryan to her overnight?” I take a swig of soda as my mind races. Sylvia defends Ryan like a bear does her cubs. Yet, she is willing to leave Summer in charge? What the hell!
“I have a good feeling about her, Lucan. It’s almost as if she has instincts to meet Ryan’s needs. I’ve tolerated some of the other nannies simply because they were needed. But I’ve never felt this level of confidence in leaving Ryan with any of them. She’s different. She’s special. I just hope nothing happens to chase her away.” She takes a deep breath and I frown.
“What is it, Sylvia?”
She takes another deep breath. “I don’t know quite how to say this.”
My heart thuds anxiously. “Just say it.”
“I’m really glad Summer and Ryan are getting on so well. It will make it easier if I have to leave – for good.”
My stomach drops, “What do you mean, ‘for good’? Are you quitting?”
“No,” she hurries to say, “At least, not now. But I know that things with Jeff are getting a lot more serious. Don’t get me wrong. I love Ryan as if he were my own child—”
I pat her hand. “You don’t have to explain. And you don’t have to feel guilty about loving your boyfriend and wanting to have a family of your own if and when he decides to make a move. If and when that time comes, I will support you one hundred percent. And I won’t hold you back.”
“And that is one of the reasons I hope that this bond he is developing with Summer keeps growing and that you seriously consider a more permanent arrangement with her. She is absolutely phenomenal.” Sylvia smiles fondly.
I nod in agreement. “I have to agree. Ryan has surprised me with how he has become attached to her. I’m hoping to learn a thing or two from her, hence the dinner invitation tonight. Did you remember to make the reservations?”
“I did.”
“Great. What time?”
“Seven. I haven’t told Summer or Ryan that I won’t be there yet. She decided it would be easier to change here so I reminded her that she has a guest room at her disposal. I’ll tell her while I pack. Then I’ll have to break the news to Ryan gently. Hopefully, having Summer stay longer plus eating out at his favorite restaurant will soften the blow.”
“Let’s hope. I really want tonight to be good,” I say.
Sylvia places her hand on my forearm. “Ryan loves you, Lucan. He just has his quirks and he doesn’t see you that often.”
I sigh, “I promise that as soon as I get these issues sorted out with the new club—”
“I’m not knocking you for working as hard as you do. Don’t get me wrong. We all know you love that boy to death, Lucan. If you didn’t, he wouldn’t be here. And what I don’t want you to do is beat yourself up over any weaknesses you feel about your relationship with Ryan.”
I shake my head. “Don’t try to make me feel better, Sylvia. I know I need to spend more time with him. These are his developmental years and I feel as though I barely know him.”
*
Tonight is a good start. Sylvia’s words ring in my mind as I strap Ryan into his car seat.
“You’re getting a bit tall, aren’t you? I’ll soon have to upgrade your seat, son.” I reach out to ruffle his hair, noting how he smiles and allows me the slightest of pats before he moves his head away.
“I’m getting to be a big boy,” he gives me his toothy grin and I feel a pang as I remember how Sylvia and I had taken turns watching over him as he went through the teething phases. I had missed his first steps, though, as I had been away on business.
I stare at him for a few seconds, smiling at him. My chest tightens. I really do love this child with all my heart.
“Sorry for taking so long.”
I look over my shoulder to find Summer standing on the bottom step. Her hair is down for the first time since I have met her. It swirls around her bare shoulders in thick sections, moving with the light evening breeze. She is wearing an emerald green sleeveless top which brings out her eyes. It is paired with dark slacks and high-heeled sandals. It is a simple yet classy ensemble.
“Not at all. May I?” I walk around to the front passenger side and open the door for her.
