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“I can see that, but why?” He tries to turn away, but I gently hold him in place. He grabs my wrist and lowers it from his face. He raises my hand to his mouth and kisses my knuckles.
“You deserve so much better.”
“Don’t,” I snap in annoyance.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t give me your ‘I’m better off without you’ bullshit,” I spit, walking toward the window and giving him my back.
“I’m sorry.” Donnie stands behind me with his hands on my hips, and I lean back, unable to resist.
“Me too.”
“For what?” He turns my body halfway and looks at me with a confused expression.
“I’m sorry that you’re hurting.”
I lead him to sit on the end of the bed while I retrieve the first aid kit. He sits quietly as I clean his wounds and patch up his cuts.
“We got into an argument before you walked in,” he says quietly.
“About us?”
He nods.
“So, you got upset, and thought going to the Pit was your only option to blow off some steam?” I ask, hoping he doesn’t sense the disappointment in my tone.
“Yeah,” he breathes out. His eyes never leave mine.
I want to shake some sense into him, but the other part of me wants to hold him. It breaks my heart to know our separation led him to a world of violence. As someone who lived it, I have a hard time understanding why he runs toward it.
“Let me be your light for once.” My voice comes out soft.
Donnie closes his eyes as if it pains him to hear those words. And maybe it has since he’s been fighting his demons alone for a long time.
“I can’t.” His words come out strained.
“Why?” My voice drops even lower.
“Because you’ve been through so much, Shorty. This thing with my parents—I don’t want you to worry about any of it.”
“Donnie, I’m pregnant withyourbaby. Anything that involves me, you, and the baby”—I point to my stomach—“I want to know. We are stronger as a team. You don’t have to do this alone anymore. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. I don’t want you to fight anymore.”
He nods.
I gently cup his face with my hands, gazing into his eyes. “Next time you feel like losing your shit, youcometo me. Next time you want a reminder of how much I need you, youcometo me.”
Donnie’s eyes flash with pride when he senses the fierce determination in my voice.
“I come to you,” he repeats with an affectional smile.
Ten minutes later…
“There.” I slam the kit shut.
When I stand up, Donnie grabs the kit and tosses it aside, keeping his eyes on me. I watch in anticipation of his next move. He notices my chest heaving and takes that as an invitation to grab my waist, pulling me closer to his face.
I run my hands through his thick hair and gently yank his head back; he lets out a satisfied groan.
