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“Come in.” When I nodded to indicate they should pass me and join me inside, I couldn’t help reaching out and running a hand down Chase’s arm as he passed. Electricity raced over my skin as goose bumps popped out in a wave down my entire body. Everything inside me screamed for physical contact. My body came alive and my heart ached so badly I could barely speak. I closed my eyes as he paused and squeezed my hand when it slid down to his. I wanted to melt into him and disappear. He was the love of my life and that face was burned in every cell of my body. The love and sexual tension between us was palpable. I was sure Kat could feel it when her eyes met mine as she passed behind Chase on her way into the house.
It would be easy to just fall into our old reality with Chase; loving, comfortable, passionate, even needy at times… we were still us and it was killing me. I knew it would be difficult seeing him again, but I didn’t think it would feel like not a second had passed. Our fingers laced together for a split second, then Chase cleared his throat and continued into the living room. He glanced around the room, trying not to be obvious. He was wondering where Jensen was. I was thankful for his absence; I didn’t feel capable of completely hiding my feelings.
“Is Remi sleeping?” Chase asked, shoving his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. He looked at me expectantly. “How has she been?”
I nodded. “She’s lethargic and a bit weak. She is sleeping, yes.” I swallowed. “She sleeps a lot more.”
Kat’s knowing gaze bounced between my face and Chase’s.
I found myself wishing that Kat and Jensen would disappear from the house and it would just be the three of us. I’d dreamed of Chase, Remi, and me being a real family. There was nothing I wanted more, though I didn’t want to hurt Jensen. My heart dropped to my stomach. I should stop wishing for something that wasn’t and couldn’t be. Jensen did exist and so did the woman Chase was dating. I ran a hand through my long hair and the heavy curtain of it dropped from my hand.
“Ummm…” I started to walk toward the kitchen feeling suddenly nervous and fidgety. “Can I get you anything? We ordered pizza last night. It’s not ideal, but there is still some left, or I can make something. I think there are a couple of beers in the fridge?” I waved my hand in the direction of the sofa and chair. “Make yourselves comfortable.”
Chase took a couple of steps toward me, lifting his hand to chest level to halt me from leaving the room. “Teagan, stop. It’s not necessary. I just wanted to see Remi for a minute.” He came closer and lowered his voice, leaving Kat to hover awkwardly behind him. “I know Jensen is here and it would be better if I just see Remi and go back to the hotel, and call the hospital to see if the results came in.”
I understood why he felt that way however, I couldn’t help feeling a wave of disappointment wash over me. It was stupid to expect he’d stay here. I couldn’t expect him to make small talk with Jensen or vice versa. The one thing we all had in common was Remi. “Okay,” I said, my eyes locking with his imploringly. “Chase, I—”
A door opened down the hall and Jensen made his entrance. He was freshly showered as he emerged from our room and came toward us. “Chase,” he nodded stiffly in acknowledgment and came forward, proffering his hand. “Good to see you.”
Kat moved forward and wrapped a hand around Chase’s bicep and fear radiated over me like an electric current. I was shaking as I watched them both; waiting for Chase’s response.
Jensen was at least trying to diffuse the situation, but Chase stiffened the second Jensen appeared; a muscle worked furiously in his jaw as he stood unmoving. Chase’s fingers curled into a fist as he licked his lips and then swallowed; his steel gaze landing on Jensen. He didn’t try to hide the venom that flashed across his features as he refused the handshake Jensen offered.
Ignoring Jensen completely, Chase looked at me and pointed down the hall. “Is Remi’s room this way?” His voice was soft and deadly calm, but I could feel the war raging inside him. Clearly, this was war. To give Jensen credit, he was trying to diffuse a volatile confrontation, but Chase was having none of it.
“Second door on the left,” Jensen answered before I could get the words out.
Chase’s head cocked and his eyes closed for a split second before he pulled on his lower lip using the thumb and forefinger of his right hand. He nodded and looked at me.
“Teagan, I’d like to speak to you for a minute. Alone.”
The air vibrated with tension.
Jensen stepped closer, putting himself between us. “Anything you say to her can be said in front of me.” The two men stared each other down for a split second.
“I have nothing to say to you,” Chase answered, his words stern. “Not one fucking thing.” Chase’s lower jaw jutted out and he looked coiled and ready to lay into Jensen without further provocation. “Don’t push me. Every instinct in me wants to rip your head off, so back. The fuck. Off.”
No one moved, but Jensen spoke. Chase didn’t know the whole story but Jensen did, and he relaxed. “Look, Chase, things aren’t as they seem. Why don’t we—”
Chase interrupted him. “Teagan?” He walked around Jensen and past me heading into the kitchen and away from the others.
I nodded and turned to follow, pausing only to indicate to Kat and Jensen to let me go without a fuss. The kitchen was through the dining room and an archway, but without a door that could be closed to separate us completely.
“I’m going to ask you this, one time. Keep him the hell away from me. I’m not here to offer the two of you absolution.”
Looking at him with pain painted all over him was hard and my own emotions threatened. I walked closer and reached out to touch him, though my hand hovered. I had no right to treat him like I used to. I was a head shorter and I had to look up into his handsome, scowling face. My voice and eyes implored him. “Please, Chase. I know this is difficult for all of us.”
He gritted his teeth and leaned in so he could speak in low tones, but his voice was filled with hatred. “I’m sorry if my fury makes the two of you uncomfortable, but really, I don’t give a flying fuck. You did this to yourselves… you did it to me, so now we are all dealing with it. So just keep him the hell away from me so we can do what we need to do for Remi.”
My throat tightened and tears welled in my eyes, blurring his features. I reached out then, to wrap my right hand around his strong left forearm. My fingers only reached about halfway around and his muscles flexed when his hand fisted. “Chase,” I begged. “Please.”
“No, Teagan. You don’t get to ask me for anything other than helping Remi. I don’t have to listen to your reasons, and I don’t have to understand.” His voice wavered and he yanked away from my grasp.
He turned and strode from the kitchen, through the house, and down the hall more quickly than I could follow. Tears were tumbling down my face as I returned to Kat and Jensen. Chase had left us all there, to watch him disappear into Remi’s room.
My heart was thrumming in my chest in a sickening way. I wanted to fall to my knees and scream or better, have the earth open up to swallow me whole. “Oh, God,” I murmured and walked to the sofa, sinking down; my head dropping so I could try to push the unwanted tears from my face. It was futile. There was no way I could hide my agony.
Jensen stood there, looking at me and when my eyes glanced off of his, I could see his anger. “Don’t waste your tears on him. If he’s going to be a prick, he’s going to be a prick.”
