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“It’s always been that way. Maybe someday he’ll tell you about it.”
Gaige rolled the firestick between his gloved hands. “I thought the dead didn’t talk about their past.”
A familiar pang prickled from the scar above my heart. “That’s why I said ‘maybe.’” I hadn’t touched the decades-old wound, but somehow, Gaige’s tired gaze slanted to my chest just the same. I wasn’t exactly eager to discuss my former life, either. Everyone at Cruor had died for a reason. Sometimes, those reasons were better left buried.
Braiding my fingers together, I ignored the weight of his stare and returned to more important matters. “Did you have another nightmare?”
“Not this time. I think yesterday’s events were chilling enough to put my mind in a stupor.” He turned his focus back to the flames. “I could’ve killed you.”
His words were incredibly soft, and I stilled. “But you didn’t.”
“I…” He let his words fall away and didn’t bother to offer anything else.
“We’ll keep working.” I shifted closer to the fire. Closer to him. “The other time you lost control, during your nightmare… What happened?”
Slowly, as if some invisible force were tugging at a stringattached to the crown of his head, he raised his chin to meet my gaze. “It was just a dream. Lots of shadows and a man.”
I frowned. “A man? Anyone you recognize?”
“I only really saw his eyes and hands. Next thing I knew, you were shaking me awake. Why?”
The final log on the fire crumbled, showering the air with sparks. Tracking one of the errant, fluttering embers, I let out a tight sigh. “We don’t really know what happens to those lost in the realm.”
“But I wasn’t lost. You found me lying in bed.”
“True.” I removed my spectacles and studied the crystal-clear lenses. “All logic indicates that you were merely experiencing a bad dream. Still…” I replaced my glasses and stood. “You must take your training seriously. We were able to rescue those nearest your room when the incident occurred, and we were fortunate that their injuries were minor. The same goes for yesterday’s incident. Next time, we might not be so lucky.”
“You act like I think this is some sort of game.” He tossed the stick into the fire with more force than necessary. Heat simmered behind his glare, chasing away some of the exhaustion from his expression. “I don’tenjoyhurting people. That pastime is better suited for you and the rest of your assassins.”
The muscles between my shoulder blades tensed. “I don’t enjoy hurting people.”
“Physically or emotionally?” Shaking his head, he let out a bitter laugh. I couldn’t help but feel like it was masking something else. Like this emotion was easier to display than whatever agony lay beneath. “Regardless, you’re pretty damn good at it.”
“Do you think I wanted this fate for myself?” I kept my tone careful, even. I’d given in to my frustrations too many times when it came to Gaige. He had a way of getting under my skin like no onehad before. Yet I could withstand the majority of his insults and his insatiable bitterness, because deep down I was afraid. I was afraid that if I reacted too strongly, too harshly, I’d burn him so badly that I’d never feel the sting of his hatred again. Only his indifference.
And that would be a hundred times worse.
He shrugged tightly. “I wouldn’t know. You’ve never—”
A loud curse from Ozias cut off our conversation, and he stumbled out of his tent. Bleary-eyed and shirtless, he blinked at us several times before letting out a deep groan.
“Just a dream.” He dragged a hand over his face. “Damn, that felt real.”
“I know the feeling,” Gaige muttered.
Stifling a yawn, Ozias nodded. “Guess I’m up. Calem already on breakfast?”
Kost lifted a shoulder. “I assume so. Haven’t seen him.”
“I spotted some mushrooms along the path just before we hit the clearing. I’ll grab those to go with whatever he’s hunting.” With another belabored yawn, he cut across the clearing in the direction of the path, stumbling as he went.
“He won’t be himself ’til he has coffee.” I glanced around until I found his percolator. He’d prepped it the night before, so I gently propped it near the coals before returning to my seat.
“He and I have that in common,” Gaige mused. Whether by design or not, Ozias had effortlessly cut the tension between us, returning things to an almost-normalcy I’d been craving.
“I think we all do. Actually, I’m not certain if Calem actually enjoys it or if he only drinks it—”
A thunderous crash, followed by a startled, distant scream, reverberated through the forest. Both Gaige and I pivoted toward the sound. Birds scattered overhead in a frantic flurry, and smaller, harmless creatures barreled past our camp before diving back intothe woods. With frenzied whinnies, our Zeelahs tugged on their knotted reins.
