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“And if she doesn’t?” I couldn’t bring myself to look at him.
Noc rounded the desk to place a firm hand on my shoulder. “She will.”
“We just have to make Gaige believe he belongs. We can do that,” Ozias said. The warmth of his tone was a gentle poke against my heightened senses, and I relished in his surety. Noc had mentioned never losing anyone to the shadows while he led Cruor, and I wondered how much of that had to do with Ozias taking over training the newly raised assassins. He never stopped caring.
Still, he’d rallied behind Gaige from the beginning, and here we sat. The four of us with our heads dipped low as we contemplated a future we could hardly fathom. Uma had said it best—no matterhow much we believed Gaige’s place was here with us, it wasn’t our job to convince him of his purpose. He had to find it on his own.
And for someone teetering on the precipice of life and nothingness, Gaige lacked the sure footing I so desperately wanted him to have. He was poised to plummet, and not one of us—but most importantly, Gaige—knew where he’d land.
I just prayed I could help break his fall.
FIFTEEN
GAIGE
By the time I crossed the lawns out front of Cruor the following morning, the Council was already waiting. I’d made a quick stop to check in on Boo and Rook, only to find both of my beasts playfully wrestling to the amusement of a few sentries. After breaking them up, I sent them into the woods so they could meet me at Hireath if they so desired. At the very least, I knew Rook would find his way to me, if only for a chance to see Felicks again.
Strange how you tame a beast that shares your feelings.I shivered at the thought and turned my focus back to the group. Raven and Leena’s Telesávras, lizard-like creatures with the ability to summon portals, lingered by their ankles. A familiar ache simmered in my chest. My own Telesávra was forever out of my reach. I could still feel the graze of his scaled hide rubbing against my calves.
This is a bad idea.My former home would be full of creatures, full of reminders. At least at Cruor, we all shared the same fate. No one here suddenly up and lost the ability to wield their shadows, and if they did, they’d probably joyously run to the nearest town and assume a normal, happy life. Still… My gaze slanted to where Kost stood, slightly apart from the group, listening but not speaking. I hadn’t expected him to stand up for me.
Shoving my dread far into the recesses of my mind, I gripped my shoulder bag and put on a smile. “Ready?”
“Whenever you are.” Leena extended her hand toward me, and I locked elbows with her. Noc held her other hand, and Kost sidled up next to me. With a delicate touch, he cupped her shoulder. He only offered me the briefest of glances, but that was enough to make my chest tighten. There might as well have been a steel thread pulled taut between us, because in my peripheral I could have sworn I saw him breathe a little too deeply. His throat bobbed as he stared at Leena’s back.
“Come on, we’ve got work to do.” Raven gestured to Calem, Ozias, and Kaori, and they took up a similar position. Once everyone was situated, Leena and Raven signaled to their beasts. Each one cracked their maws open wide, detaching their jaws and summoning a sparkling, powder-white portal. They sparked and snapped like flames devouring wood, but I knew from experience that we’d teleport painlessly and instantaneously to the beasts’ designated hearth point—in this case, Hireath—set by Leena and Raven.
Even though I knew Ocnolog had destroyed our sanctuary when he’d risen from his underground tomb, part of me still hoped to find Hireath intact. I longed to see the marble keep glistening under the fine spray of water from the crystal falls. Or the rows of gargantuan trees dotted with alabaster platforms and wooden buildings suspended high above the earth in the interconnected network of branches. I wanted to inhale the mineral-coated air and hold it in my lungs, drink in the sight of vibrant flowers crowding smooth pathways through the courtyard. Most of all, I longed to hear the joyous composition of competing beast calls, all different but somehow in sync.
But when I manifested on the other side of the portal, the only thing I got was a knife twisting in my gut.
Hireath was gone. My arm fell away from Leena’s as I took a few steps forward. Brittle, singed grass crunched beneath my feet. Splintered trees, blackened by fire, rose in sharpened spires around what used to be the keep. A canyon cleaved through the charred earth, and deep gouges ran the length of either side where Ocnolog had clawed his way out. And all around the ruptured ground was rubble. Shattered pieces of slab and marble, mangled debris from homes, furniture broken and dismantled. Everything else was simply ash, and it coated the quiet space in a bone-colored dust.
“It was worse before,” Kaori said as she moved to my side. “We’ve already disposed of most of the debris, but it will take time before the trees can support the weight of our buildings again.”
I didn’t know how it could’ve looked worse than this. With a thick swallow, I nodded. “I’m glad no one was hurt.”
“I’m not sure it will ever be the city it was.” Raven sauntered toward the muddy banks and stared out across the basin. The ever-present crash of the falls still echoed, but even that sound felt muted. Subdued. “Everyone is eager to build a temple of sorts, but many have voiced a desire to travel or live elsewhere now that Charmers are no longer at risk of being captured.”
Leena joined us and leaned her head against my shoulder. “It will be smaller, like a town, but no less beautiful or welcoming than before.”
My throat swelled shut at her words, and I relished the weight of her against my frame. Looping my arm around her, I gave her a gentle squeeze—more for my own sake than hers. “I’ll help however I can.”
She beamed up at me. “Good.”
Noc cleared his throat, and we turned to meet his gaze. Until that point, none of the assassins had spoken. It was as if they were giving me a chance to react, to soak in what had happened andprocess it without interfering. They’d all been here before, or at least shadow walked to Hireath and witnessed the ruination for themselves. Only I had staved off returning to the place I once called my home. A savage, deep-seated guilt churned in my stomach. I should’ve come sooner. My own fears, my own inadequacies, were nothing compared to the devastation all around us.
“Your parents?” Noc prompted when we didn’t respond.
Leena brightened. “Right. They, along with the rest of the Charmers who want to continue to live here, have started to rebuild homes up there.” She pointed to the top of the falls and beckoned for us to follow. “Fortunately, Ocnolog didn’t damage that area.”
We picked our way across the rubble-strewn ground and strode closer to the falls as we all fell silent. Which was fine—my throat was still pained and dry, and forcing conversation felt like it would only heighten my guilt. When we passed behind the sheet of oppressive water, Leena led us along a slick, stone path. With my jaw clenched tight, I followed her. This was the fastest way to the top of the falls. The very same place where we used to build funeral pyres for our dead.
We moved single file through the damp cavern. Lanterns with blue flames dotted the rock walls, illuminating stalactites covered in crystal water droplets. The subtle drip of their descent filled the space, until we came upon a staircase carved of the same stone as the mountain. We climbed upward in a gradual spiral, and at least twice I heard Raven mumbling about needing to adjust her Telesávra’s hearth point to the top of the falls.
A faint smile ghosted my lips. “You haven’t done that yet?”
I could practically hear her shrug. “I haven’t needed to. Coming to save your ass was the first time we’d left Hireath, so I didn’t think about it.”
