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“Something out there is antagonizing the monsters, and peoplekeep getting hurt.” He stifled a yawn. “There’s every reason to rush.”
“The Charmers have stationed some of their beasts within the woods to act as sentries. If another attack is coming, we’ll be better prepared this time.” I closed the book and set it on the nightstand. “You should rest.”
He pulled back the sheets and swung his legs over the side. “I just want to talk to Isla. She made it a point to travel all this way, and it’ll be nice to have reassurance once and for all.” He clasped his hands together and stared at the floor. “I–I know I’ve lost control countless times. But this isn’t me. It can’t be.”
I moved from the chair to sit on the bed beside him and brushed my knuckles along his cheek. “I know.”
“Thanks,” he mumbled, leaning into my touch. He pushed past my hand to rest his head in the crook of my neck. “I don’t know what I would have done if you didn’t believe me.”
Slipping a delicate hand around his waist, I melted into him. When he’d first told me the shadows weren’t his in the clearing, I’d hesitated to respond. I could see the wild desperation in his gaze, but there was also something else. Determination. A pure sense of relief. A glimmer of hope. So I’d spent the battle studying the erratic tendrils as they coursed over the monsters. There were moments where they behaved like Gaige’s, which led me to believe that whatever, whomever, we were dealing with never quite got a firm grasp on their power. But Gaige had been right—there was something different about the shadows I hadn’t noticed before. A frenetic sort of energy that was distinct from the fight-or-flight response I’d noticed with Gaige’s power.
These shadows reeked of unbridled destruction, and they left a puzzle in their wake.
He broke my reverie with a single graze of his finger against Felicks’s key. “I’m surprised you don’t have him out.”
“He doesn’t like to share the bed,” I said. “But I suppose it wouldn’t be a bad idea to have him on alert. He can notify us faster than the Charmers’ beasts if another attack is coming.”
Gaige chuckled. “You two are close. Tell me… Are there moments where you feel like you have his power? Can see what’s coming, even if he’s not here?”
I stilled. “Yes. But I wasn’t aware such a thing was possible.”
“It’s extremely rare, even for Charmers. And the effects aren’t consistent.” He pulled back to pin Okean’s key between his forefinger and thumb. “For example, it’s not like I can shoot water out of my palms just because I have a unique bond with Okean. However, I do feel a sense of peace near bodies of water, and I can hold my breath almost as long as him.”
“That’s incredible,” I murmured. A gentle warmth throbbed from Felicks’s key. He’d given me so much. I was honored to call him my beast, and I willed him to feel every ounce of love and devotion that I held for him.
“Come on,” Gaige said, freeing himself from my embrace to stand. “I want to check in with the others.”
Sighing, I put aside the newfound knowledge Gaige had shared with me and got back to matters at hand. “Fine. But keep it short.”
“I promise we’ll both return to bed within the hour.”
I raised a brow at him. “Really, now?”
“No sense in hiding it.” He paused. “Unless you prefer it that way.”
The tops of my ears burned. “I’m not entirely sure how to act.”
Gaige crouched before me and clasped my hands in his. “I’d love to run through the streets of Wilheim and tell everyone that you are mine and mine alone. But I’ll follow your lead, Kost. Whatever makes you comfortable.”
Heat ravaged my cheeks and neck, but I refused to break hisgaze. I’d never witnessed a more beautiful color than that of his eyes, and now, magnified by the raw intensity of his declaration, I wished I were a painter so I could capture the hue. I wanted to coat the walls in my room with it and surround myself with him entirely. Always.
Gaige dipped his head just slightly, lowering his voice. “I plan on courting you, Kost. And then one day, I plan on naming you myanam-cara. I might be undead, but that custom is still very important to me.”
“Gaige…” My voice was raw with unspoken emotion. Gods, I loved him. I loved him so much it hurt but I couldn’t bring myself to say it. I wanted him to know what he meant to me, how he made me feel, but there was still a sliver of my old self pulling on the reins. I’d been burned badly by Jude. I’d taken a blade for him, given my life for him, only to be abandoned. If I gave Gaige my love, what would he do?
“I…” The words just wouldn’t come. “It’s been a long time. A really long time. All of this is so…difficult for me.” It shouldn’t have been. Everything with Gaige felt honest and real. But I’d felt like that with Jude, too. How was I supposed to know that it wouldn’t happen again?
Small dimples burrowed into Gaige’s cheek as he smiled. “Don’t worry, Kost. You don’t have to do or say anything. Let’s just let it be, yeah? We’ll figure it out in time.”
My throat bobbed and I nodded. “Right.”
Gaige’s grin deepened. “Though you are quite eloquent when you want to be. I expect a full-hearted confession one day. I want flowers and chocolates and wine and a sinful display of this.” He dragged his fingers down my chest and then gently caressed my inner thigh. Of course, I swelled at his touch and his sultry words.
As his fingers wandered over my growing erection, I bit back a moan. “Are we leaving this room or not?”
He leaned in and pressed his lips to the shelf of my ear. “We can resume later.”
“Or we can sleep like you’re supposed to,” I countered, despite the fact everything in my body rebelled at the idea.
