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Candice and I exchange a glance. She bunches her lips to the side. “Still.”
Lily straightens her shoulders. She’s younger than the two of us, but she’s always been more independent. Ever since she took off on her first trip to Peru, she hasn’t stayed home for longer than a few months. She built her business by herself, and flitted from country to country, relationship to relationship.
She always seemed to enjoy it more than any kind of stability.
Watching her chew her lip now, though, I wonder if she still feels the same way. Maybe she thought Rudy was different. Babies can change your outlook on life pretty radically—something I know from firsthand experience. Maybe Lily was hoping for something more with Rudy.
“He hurts you, and I’ll chop his balls off,” Candice announces, and then it’s time for us to order.
CHAPTER 17
Rudy
I leave my lunch appointment with three new contact numbers for friends of Georgia’s that would just love to relocate, according to her. She somehow also manages to tell—no, demand—that we meet up again for the handover of the keys, and we might as well make a meal of it, shouldn’t we?
Back at my car, I sit behind the wheel and let out a long breath. That meal wasn’t unpleasant, but it was tiring. I close my eyes for a beat, then start the engine.
Instead of driving to my place or my office or even Lily’s place, I find myself in front of my grandmother’s bookstore. All is quiet inside when I push the door open, and then I find myself face-to-face with my cousin.
“Jared,” I say, half-startled. “I didn’t know you could read.” The words are automatic, a barb that always seems easy to reach for whenever my cousin’s sneering face is near.
Jared puts three books on the counter and glances at me. He looks…tired. With a breath, he turns to face me. “Can we not do this?” he finally asks.
A frown tugs at my brow. “Do what?”
“I know it’s my fault we don’t get along. I… I’m sorry.”
I blink. “Oh.”
“That’s it? Just ‘oh’?”
My throat feels itchy, so I clear it. “Where is this coming from?”
“I was always jealous of you, you know,” he says, a palm leaning against the counter. “Everything comes so easy to you. Women, money, success. And you always just toss it away like it means nothing.”
A hot, prickly feeling spreads through my chest. “Excuse me?”
Jared closes his eyes. “Never mind.”
We both turn toward the stacks when my grandmother comes toddling down toward us. She glances at me, then Jared, then back at me, and starts punching the prices for Jared’s new books into her antiquated cash register. “You nearly done with the audit?” Grandma asks me without looking my way.
“Nearly,” I tell her. “Only a few loose ends to tie up now.”
She grunts, then tells Jared his total. I walk away as he pays for his new books, letting my feet carry me the few blocks toward Lily’s place. It’s not a conscious decision to go there, but at the back of my mind, I know I won’t be able to stay away.
My cousin’s words rattle around my brain. Is he right? I’ve never felt like things came easy to me—I always felt like I had to work for everything I have. My business didn’t fall into my lap; I built it. Women are attracted to me, sure, but I haven’t had a successful relationship in years. So where does he get the idea that I’ve got some kind of divine luck?
Before I can stop myself, I press the buzzer to Lily’s apartment. Her name is written in black ink on a little sticker next to the button. She lives in a four-story building made of brown brick that was probably built in the seventies. Balconies jut out of the building at regular intervals. The nearest one has a few old pots filled with dry dirt and dead plants.
“Yeah?” Lily’s voice says through the intercom speaker.
“It’s me,” I say. “Rudy.”
There’s a pause, and I wonder if I should have stayed away. Why am I here, anyway? We already decided to take the day off from working on my grandmother’s audit. I had no plans to see her. I haven’t even called her. She probably thinks it’s weird for me to show up at her place.
It is weird for me to show up at her place, but I came here without even thinking, like I was drawn here by some external force.
Then the buzzer sounds and the door unlatches, and I push it to step through.
