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As much as I want her—and I really fucking do—I know this kind of thing can’t be rushed. And I don’t want to risk pushing her too far or doing something she’s gonna regret later.
So I pull away from her, breaking the kiss.
Willow’s large brown eyes are wild, and her face is flushed. She reaches for me again, breathing hard. She makes a needy sound, but it’s not the kind I like, so I put a hand on her chest, gently holding her back.
“Solnyshka,” I warn gruffly. “You don’t wanna do this.”
“Yes, Ido.” She pushes against my hold on her. “I do want to.”
“Okay, maybe you do. But I don’t know if you’re ready for it, and I don’t wanna—”
“I am ready. I’m so fucking ready, and I’m so fucking tired of not being able to have this, Malice.” Her voice is thick with emotion, and she looks like she’s on the verge of tears.
My body roars with its own need, my cock rock hard already and pressing against the front of my jeans. It’s fucking begging to just take her and fuck her, to bend her over the kitchen island and claim her again right here and now.
I drag in a deep breath and then another, trying to clear my head enough to think past all of that.
“Willow.” I use her real name this time instead of my nickname for her, speaking more firmly this time.
She takes a deep breath of her own, stepping back and wrapping her arms around herself. She shakes her head, making the tousled mane of her dyed brown hair shift around her shoulders.
“I’ve been reading those books you got me,” she whispers. “And every time I read them, I think of the men in my life that I love… and I want to be with them. I think of all the things we used to do, and the way you used to make me feel. I get turned on reading those books, caught up in the sex scenes, and I’m so fucking sick of whatever fucked up shit is in my mind, holding me back from experiencing that myself.”
I swallow hard, taking in how intense she sounds. She’s serious about this, and my head is flooded with images of her reading those books and getting wet and needy.
My cock is hard enough to punch through a wall right now, but I keep myself under control. This isn’t about me and my needs. This is about Willow. So as much as I do want to just bend her over and fuck her, raw and dirty like I used to, I have to take a different approach.
“Go get one of those books,” I tell her, my voice coming out husky with need. “One of your favorite ones that you’ve read.”
Willow blinks, her brows pinching together. But she doesn’t argue, turning and leaving the room.
She comes back a few minutes later with the book, and I look at it, then back up at her as I nod. “Good girl. Now go sit on the couch.”
She does, looking at me in confusion as I follow her into the living room.
“Did you touch yourself when you were reading these books?” I ask, my gaze locked on her as she settles on one end of the large leather couch.
She sucks in a breath. Just a tiny inhalation of air, but it’s enough to make desire pulse through me like a caged animal. Then she shakes her head, her cheeks going pink. “No.”
“Did you want to?”
“Yes,” she admits, dragging her bottom lip between her teeth.
I grit my teeth, reaching down to palm my cock just to keep myself from exploding. “Do it, then. Let me see it.”
Her eyebrows shoot upward. “You want me to read… now?”
I shake my head and hold out my hand for the book. “No. I’m gonna read to you, and I want you to get yourself off.”
Willow sucks in a surprised breath. I know she wasn’t expecting me to say that, but I recognize the look in her eyes as she nods slowly, her tongue darting out to wet her lips. She likes this idea.
Her gaze tracks every movement as I take the book from her and then sit down on the other end of the couch. It’s big enough that there’s still some space between us, but we’re close enough that I can see the way her pupils have dilated slightly.
I take my time, kicking out my legs and leaning back a little before I open the book and flip through it. I got Willow a mix of newer books and some that I remembered my mom reading back when my brothers and I were younger. This is one of the newer ones, and I’m surprised to see that some of the scenes look hot as hell.
“You dirty little girl,” I murmur, glancing over at Willow as I hold the book open to a particularly sexy scene. “You’ve been reading these at night, picturing all of this shit happening to you, haven’t you? Do you like to imagine you’re her?”
“Yes.” She shifts on the cushion a little, turning to face me more fully. “Except I…”
