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“I’m fine,” I mutter around my toothbrush. “Not feeling well is all.”
“I know it’s been hard. I’m here for you in any way I can be. In any way you want me to be,” he says. “I’m sorry I wasn’t able to get to you sooner.”
The regret in his voice has me spitting the toothpaste out so I can speak. “It isn’t your fault,” I reply. “Don’t blame yourself.” I open the door to talk to him, but he isn’t there. Is that what his distance is about? He thinks it is his fault? It’s mine. I should have never left the safety of the house.
With a long exhale, I shut the door, not knowing where to begin to fix my relationship with Ari.
My stomach turns again, and I place my hand against it, waiting for the nausea to pass. When it does, I bend down and open the cabinets to vanity, rummaging through our things until I find the box I’m looking for. Ari bought a box of pregnancy tests when I first arrived. I honestly didn’t think I’d have to use them any time soon. I knew it took time to get pregnant and I never planned on having the earth-shattering, mind-blowing sex I have had with him.
I’m so glad I didn’t insist on going to the clinic or I would have missed out on an amazing experience.
With a deep breath, I open the box, and unwrap the test.
I do my business, click the cap back on, flush, lie it flat on the counter, then wash my hands. I know I have to wait three minutes, but why didn’t anyone tell me they were the longest three minutes of my damn life?
I tap my fingers against the counter, thinking about how to tell Ari I’m pregnant—if I am. I want to. I don’t want to keep it from him, but right now, I don’t feel like I can tell him. He’s so distant right now and I’m not sure how he’d feel knowing I’m pregnant and was pregnant during the Bianchi fiasco. He’d blame himself more.
If I am, I’ll tell him.
Eventually.
“Moment of truth,” I say to myself, reaching for the stick that has the answer that will change my life forever.
It’s positive.
I’m pregnant.
Tears gather in my eyes, and I don’t know why. I’m happy. I’m relieved. I’m scared. This was the plan. I want to be happy, but now I’m nervous to say anything to Ari. He treats me like I’m broken now. I can’t imagine how he’ll treat me when he finds out.
I tuck the test back in the package, then slip it into the box it came in. I flip the box over, so it doesn’t look like I opened it and set it inside the cabinet.
I open the door and see Ari standing in front of the closet, holding up a pair of shoes.
“Oh, really? Are we back to this, Tesoro?” he asks, narrowing his eyes at me.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I shrug, trying to keep my composure but the words ‘I’m pregnant’ are on the tip of my tongue. I want to tell him. I want to scream at him.
But nothing comes out.
He drops his shoes and lifts his brow. “You don’t? So all of my shoelaces have gone missing on their own? They just upped and grew legs?”
“I guess,” I say as I head to the bedroom door.
I open it, but Ari is behind me, slamming it shut with his palm. His back is against my front and the warmth from his body seeps into me. The air becomes thick with tension and his other arm comes up to cage me in.
His nose brushes against my neck and he inhales, pressing a kiss to the sensitive spot under my ear. “You don’t know how much I’ve missed you.” He drags his lips down my neck and I duck under his arm.
And I push him. “Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me!” I shout at him, swinging the door open to march down the hallway.
I run down the steps and exit the front door, Gianni straightening as he sees me leave.
“Rosie? What’s wrong? Oh.” He falls short when he notices my husband behind me. “Don’t leave the grounds.”
“Oh, yeah. I believe I learned my lesson last time.” I start running through the yard, the grass tickling under the pads of my feet.
“Rosie!” Ari shouts after me, but I don’t stop.
My arms pump as I run, gaining speed, trying to go as fast as I can. The breeze flows against my face, drying the tears on my cheeks.
