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The club was rocking. Fine bumps ran the length of my arms as I mumbled, word for word, the song that Milo loved. When the opportunity presented itself, I switched up the words to add his name. Putting a bit of distance between us, I tapped his chest with the back of my hand, bobbing my head, and expressing the love I had for him through lyrics.
“Milo my dog. That’s fa sho. We won’t fall out ’bout shit… especially not ’bout no bitch.”
I brought him in for a hug as the record continued. As we locked hands and let one another go, we rejoined Lil Baby as he slid on the beat.
“Me and Ced get them loads.”
“We get ’em for the low.” Makai approached, curving his arm as if he was holding kilos at his sides.
“I got my hood in control!” Milo belted. “I got my left wrist on froze. I got my right wrist on froze.” He flashed the new presidential on his wrist that I’d just put on him.
From side to side, I rocked, feeling every word that was spat. As the middle of the song approached, I prepared for a few of my favorite lines. There was no doubt about it; the young nigga was in his bag when he penned this anthem.
“I’m a big boss gotta say so. They’ll walk you down if I say so.”
“Dracos on dracos on dracos on dracos,” Makai said loud and clear.
Track after track, the DJ laced the club with thunder. Suddenly, my appreciation for the invitation was apparent. The smile on my face as I watched the men I’d known since boys celebrate the birth of a Black king nearly split the corners of my mouth.
Milo was special, not just to me, but to us all. Though he was definitely a product of his environment, he was as sharp as they came. He’d graduated from high school by the age of fifteen and became a doctor by the time he was twenty-six.
Infatuated with the mind and still holding onto the pain our mother caused, he chased the science behind what made a brain snap, trying his hardest to find a way to snap it back into place. He and our brother Chem were lab rats, but Milo stayed in the field, too. The city’s top psychiatrist, he’d been named five years in a row.
I wasn’t sure where time had gone, but so much had passed when I finally walked out of UnHinged and slid into the back of my ride. Willie slammed the door behind me and dipped into the driver’s seat. We sped through the parking lot in route to my favorite place. I wasn’t sure if my head was spinning from the bottle I’d finished off or being overstimulated in a club full of unfamiliar faces. I rested my head, hoping to quiet the rattling sooner than later.
Finally, I managed to settle my thoughts and embrace the silence around me. Knowing home was my destination led me to a happier place, mentally and emotionally. It didn’t matter that I was instructed not to cut out early and leave the guys. Anna would just have to get on my ass later. Right now, I was intoxicated with a hard dick and needed her pussy to soften it.
At the thought of her, the message she’d sent me came to mind again. I slid my phone from my pocket and unlocked the screen. The notification was still there, unread and sent almost an hour ago. I cringed when I glanced at the time.
Aussie. The blurred image plastered on my screen was evidence that Aussie had gotten hold of Anna’s phone again. Nevertheless, my heart smiled. She’d been allowed to stay up after her nightly feeding because I couldn’t bear the sight of Anna rocking her back to sleep, knowing I’d be leaving soon. Against her better judgment, my wife obliged and I was wondering how long she paid that price before Aussie finally went down again.
I blackened the screen with the side button, relieved that Anna’s message was nothing more than a result of our daughter’s late night and untamable curiosity. She’d been trying to figure out how phones worked since she laid her eyes on one as a baby. Every chance she got, she was trying to stuff them in her mouth or banging them on the floor. Even the tiny, colorful ones we’d gotten her weren’t safe in Aussie’s hands.
Though I was tired, the pains that began shooting through my chest wouldn’t allow me to rest. Keeping my eyes closed, I used my knuckles to knead it, rubbing from one side to the other. It was useless. The closer we got to home, the tighter my chest got and the more it ached. Pressure mounted, making it feel like someone had intentionally placed all their weight on my heart. By the time we pulled into the driveway, my face was contorted in a few different ways and I was struggling to exit the vehicle.
“You good, Boss?”
“Yeah. Fucking chest pains.” I nearly stumbled out of the back seat, holding a hand to my chest.
“Looks like a visit to Doc is on your list of to-dos this week.”
“Yeah. I’ll have Anna set it up. Fucking blood pressure, man.”
I agreed. Willie and Anna were the only two who knew about my visits to Dr. Yurin. A year ago, I’d discovered the stars I saw sometimes when standing weren’t normal, and neither were the chest pains I experienced every once in a while. However, they’d never been so intense and felt this way. This was a different type of pain, one I couldn’t quite explain. One that didn’t feel health-related, though physical.
“A silent killer among Black men.”
“I see.”
“Goodnight, Boss.”
“Aight, Willie.”
I unlocked my phone on the way to the door and pulled up the group thread I shared with Milo, Makai and Lawe, who had shown up to the club just before I cut out.
Everybody straight?I texted, desperate for answers. I quickly tapped their locations and discovered they were all still in the same spot.
Upon entering my home, Aussie’s tearful protest could be heard immediately. Worry lines crossed my forehead, realizing I’d made a horrible mistake by requesting she stayed up until I left and be put down again after. I was apologizing profusely in my head as I dropped my keys and made my way up the stairs to rescue Anna.
