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Speaking of, I really should go visit her and give her the chance to explain things. She deserves that. Swallowing hard, I decide that now is a good time to meet the two girls that are half me and half Karri.
I still can’t believe that I’m a dad. Does this mean that I need to trade my car in for a minivan? A shiver runs down my spine at the thought. Minivans remind me of soccer moms. They are not sexy in the least.
As I pull up to Karri’s house, nerves suddenly overtake me and sweat beads on my forehead. “Pull it together, Adam.” I feel like an idiot talking to myself in the middle of the street. Wiping my damp palms on my pants, I head for the door.
Before I can lift my hand to knock, the door swings open. On the other side is a very fierce looking Dena. Her hands land on her hips, lips pursing. “If you came here to cause a scene, you can march your happy butt back to that expensive car and leave.”
Raising my hands in surrender, I say, “I’m not here to cause a scene.” She doesn’t move from her stance. Good. Karri needs a friend like her. “I’m here to speak with Karri, and hopefully meet the girls.” I don’t say my girls, because I understand that I have not earned the right to call them mine, yet.
“Let him in.” Karri sounds as tired as I feel. That fact makes me sad, because I know her stress and exhaustion are due to my behavior. Well, that and the fact she is caring for two infant children.
Sizing me up, Dena finally steps back, but she holds her hand out before I can take a step inside. “If you hurt her again, I will knock you over the head with a frying pan. My job is not more important than those three.”
“Understood.”
Dena moves her hand, allowing me to enter their home. “I’ll just be in the other room.”
Karri is sitting on the floor, playing with the girls. Though it’s only been three weeks since I last saw them, they have changed so much. Not knowing what to do, I stand across the room from them, watching the girls play with the toys strewn about the living room.
“Why are you here, Adam?” I open my mouth, but no words come out. Biting her bottom lip, she nods and gets up. After retrieving the business tablet from the end table, she crosses the room and hands it to me. “I wondered how long it would take you to replace me.”
Replace her? I haven’t replaced her. Heck, I haven’t even tried to find a new assistant. Karri is the best I’ve ever had. She knows exactly what she’s doing, and she makes my work life flow easily. “I haven’t replaced you.”
Furrowing her brows, she steps back. “You haven’t?”
“No.”
“Then why are you here?” She returns to her spot on the floor, smiling at the baby girl wearing a purple dress. “You’ve made it abundantly clear that you don’t want children.” Her focus is on the babies, not me. “You dumped me without asking questions. One glimpse of the girls and suddenly I was no longer desirable, or worth keeping as your assistant.”
“I was in shock.”
“For three weeks?” Tears spill down her cheeks and I move toward her, kneeling beside her to wipe away the evidence of pain. “You have not reached out once in the last three weeks.”
There are no words I can say that will make this better. I acted like a fool and hurt the one person I care for the most. “I was being immature, I’m sorry.”
She places the tablet on the coffee table, out of reach of the two curious girls that are grabbing everything within reach. “You were.”
I chuckle at her quickness to agree with my immaturity. “If I could go back in time, I would.”
“What’s done is done.” Drying the remaining wetness from her lashes, she turns to face me. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about them sooner. When you mentioned never wanting children, I got scared. I didn’t want you to hate them.”
This just proves how great of a mother Karri is. Her willingness to protect them. “After having time to think things through, and several conversations with my dad, I’ve come to realize that having children doesn’t have to take away from who I am as a lawyer.”
“That’s good.” Karri wraps her arms around her knees, seeming so small and fragile. “They need their father.”
They need their father. I don’t miss the fact that she didn’t mention she needs me. “And what about you?”
“What about me?” Averting her gaze to the floor like it’s the most interesting thing in the world, she shrugs her shoulders. “I’m happy you want to take that step with them.”
“I’m not talking about that, Karri.” Cupping her face, I bring her gaze back to mine. “I want to know if you need me.”
“It doesn’t matter what I need. All that matters is that they get what they need.” What a selfless heart she has.
“They will get everything they need.” Bringing her lips to mine, I kiss her, pouring my heart into it. I want her to know that she is special to me, even if I initially acted a fool and lashed out like an adolescent. I need her to know that I want this. I want her. “But I also want to give you everything you need.”
“But…you were so angry.”
“I was.” Then I kiss her again so she can feel how much I want her. “But I like you, Karri. In the time we have been dating, you have claimed a piece of my heart. A piece that I don’t want back.”
