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I’m on the verge of promising him that he will see his grandfather soon, but for some reason, I stop. I let myself play in the realms of different alternate realities and, in many of them, Dad doesn’t come back at all. If there’s even the slightest chance of that, I know I shouldn’t be giving Adam false hope.
Nothing kills a person’s spirit faster than that. I would know.
Instead, I try to gather him up in my arms, but he pushes away, aiming his anger at me because he doesn’t know what else to do with it.
He’s racing out of the kitchen when Celine appears in the doorframe. I spring upright, startled to see her. I’d expected her to steer clear of the house for days, weeks even, just to avoid me. The fact that she’s here at all has to be a good sign, right?
Or maybe it’s a bad one. I have no way of telling and recent history has proven that my instincts aren’t good for a damn thing.
“Whoa,” she says, squatting down in front of the bull-rushing Adam and opening her arms out so that he can’t sneak past. “Where are you going in such a hurry, little man?”
“I’m gonna go look for Grandpa.”
“One day, your mama and I are going to tell you all about Grandpa,” she says cryptically. That grabs his attention immediately. I can’t see his face, but his shoulders go still.
He’s quiet for a moment before he takes the bait. “What about Grandpa?”
Celine arches an eyebrow in surprise. “He didn’t tell you?”
Adam’s little head shakes from side to side.
“He was probably waiting until you were old enough. But I think you’re ready now.”
“Tell me, tell me!” he insists.
I have no idea what Celine is about to tell him, but I realize that whatever it is, I trust her. Despite the tension between us right now, she still looks at Adam with nothing but affection in her eyes.
“Your grandpa is aspy,” she whispers conspiratorially.
“Grandpa?” Adam sounds completely dumbfounded.
“Mhmm,” Celine hums with a nod. “Why do you think you lived so far away from me for so long? Grandpa was trying to protect you and your mama. You guys were undercover.”
“Whoa…”
She smiles. “Grandpa is a pretty cool guy.”
“But…are yousure?Isn’t he too old?”
“You’re never too old to be anything,” she advises him. “And if Grandpa is brave enough to go out there and be a spy, you need to be brave enough to let him do his job. Okay?”
Adam considers that for a moment. “I’m brave,” he says at last.
“I know you are.” She drops a kiss on his forehead before straightening up. “Now, why don’t you go play in the garden?”
Adam turns to me, apparently forgetting that, just two seconds ago, I was persona non grata. “Mama, did you hear that? Grandpa’s a spy! Isn’t that cool? I’m gonna go practice being a spy in the garden, okay?”
“Okay, baby. Be careful.”
“I don’t have to be careful,” he announces. “I’m a spy!”
He blazes off through the French doors that lead out into the patio. The moment he’s out of earshot, I turn to Celine. “Thanks for that. Nothing I said did the trick.”
Her face is carefully composed. “I find the truth can do wonders sometimes.”
I nod. “Touché.”
She sighs and sits down at the table in the nook. When I continue to linger awkwardly off to the side, she glances at me impatiently. “Are you just going to stand there gawking at me or are you going to sit down?”
