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“Sorry, big guy,” Brad says suddenly, “I didn’t mean to… How about we just talk about better things, huh?” he adds, clearing his throat a little, giving me an “all clear” look as he forgives my unprofessional and bizarre performance in his house today. That’s what friends do, right? They forgive and forget. They move on.
“Like dinner?” I ask, my mouth peeling wide once it pegs that he suspects nothing about what’s really been eating me up from the inside, not just since I walked in the door. This has been festering for six months, but if Brad has no clue I’m aching for his daughter, half the battle is won. I just have to get used to being “normal” when Beth’s around. I can’t just imagine myself on top of her every time she’s in the room.
You just got off to a shaky start. Been here five minutes, so take a breath and slow down.
“I’ve had a hankering for ribs all week,” Brad grins, eager to fulfill his promise and talk about better things.
I nod approvingly, even though food is the last thing on my mind, but dammit, if Beth isn’t the first thing out of my mouth and the only thing I want in my mouth right now. “What about Beth?” I hear myself asking aloud. “I mean, does she like ribs?” I add to cover myself.
I know Lucy would eat the rib straight off an animal, but it’s clear to me when I say it that my effort to think or say anything that isn’t all about Beth is gonna be more challenging than I thought.
“Uh, Beth usually gets a salad when we order out,” Brad observes casually, making me frown.
Salad!? How the hell is she supposed to sustain herself on rabbit food? A growing girl needs meat and lots of it. I’m sure I can tempt her to have some of mine when it arrives if all she wants is asalad.
“What was that?” Brad asks, his head tilting rapidly as we hear the front door banging. My instinct is to go check it out—my first and only thought being Beth, of course—but it’s not my house, and she’s not my daughter. Brad moves past me with a sidelong glance, telling me as much though he’s used to a man my size kinda filling up all the space and taking charge whenever anything unexpected happens—even something as innocent as a door banging in the house. I’m forced to let Brad go first, which causes my jaw to clench. My whole body suddenly tenses as Beth reappears in the kitchen.
“What’s goin’ on, honey?” Brad chimes. “Someone else here?”
“Lucy must’ve stepped out for some air,” Beth says, giving an awkward-looking shrug. Brad’s eyes shoot straight at me as he turns, waiting for me to react.
I make a point of keeping my eyes on Brad, eventually shrugging myself. “Probably not a bad idea,” I remark, not meaning to sound like Brad should join Lucy and take a walk.
“We’re ordering ribs,” Brad announces with forced cheerfulness. Beth crimps a smile and nods while I fish my phone out of my pants, speed-dialing Lucy. It goes to voice mail, and I make a point of leaving her a message. “Hey, Luce? I’m worried that you’re unwell and just taking off like that. Gimme a call or come back to Brad’s house, please,” I clip, sounding every bit the father I try hard not to be with her.
If she’s ill, I don’t want her wandering about. I also don’t want any more excitement today. Coming home was supposed to be a happy occasion, and I’m already wondering if I should’ve stayed in London as if six more months of obsessing over her best friend would help. Yeah, right.
“We could go look for her,” Beth suggests, but Brad quickly dismisses the idea.
“She’s fine,” he sighs. “Like you said, she just went out for some air. She’ll be back before you know it. Bowdie, how about you freshen up and get changed, huh? You must be aching for a hot shower and some clean clothes after your trip.” I feel my mouth curling down into a frown. “Bathroom’s free now,” Brad adds, giving me the impression he’s telling me to go hose myself down, not just suggesting it.
“You’re probably right,” I reluctantly agree, sniffing my pits through my shirt. I always hate it when Brad’s right. A shower and change shoulda been the first thing I focused on when I arrived. So, grabbing my smallest bag by the front door, I do as I’m told. I listen closely to catch every word Beth says as she and her dad discuss takeout and all of us having a night in, playing board games, of all things.
Jesus.
I can’t stay still with Beth anywhere near me for a full minute. The prospect of hunching over for hours on end, rolling dice, and moving plastic pegs around seems insulting compared to the night I’d rather spend with his daughter, rolling her about instead and thumbing her peg until she comes as hard as I know I have to right now. As the saying goes, doctors make the worst patients, and following my friend’s advice, I peel myself out of my shirt and pants after making a face when I have to close and lock the door of the tiny bathroom.
In case she sees, but that’s the whole point. I want her to see what she’s missing. I want her to see what I have for her.
My arousal slaps loudly against my abs as I undress, making me groan. It’s as if my body senses shower time is also the time to let off some steam of my own as well as from the shower head.
Beth time, but no, I can’t. I won’t. Not only will I not yank off in my buddy’s bathroom, but I also won’t waste a drop of what I have simmering in my loins. I don’t know how I’m gonna do it. Hell, I don’t even know if it’s what Beth wants.
Her eyes tell a different story, though. I know when a girl’s just glancing and checking out a man’s crotch.
I’m gonna find out. I have to. Otherwise, I’ll lose my mind, and once I discover what she wants, I’m gonna make sure every stroke of my manhood is only inside her from now on.
I need to let her know I’m interested without actually saying it. I’ll tell her and see how she reacts.
Easier said than done, but I am known for pulling the odd miracle now and then.
CHAPTERFIVE
Beth
The sound of the shower running is all the cover my dad needs to ask me everything he can’t with Bowdie in the room. Try as I might, I can’t help growling in annoyance when he starts up about Lucy.
I love Lucy. She’s my best friend, but I’m also allowed to hate how she acts occasionally. God knows, sharing a room with her for six months is enough to drive anyone to distraction, and today of all days, with her dad coming home so soon, she’s picked a fine time to have one of her little “episodes.” It’s something my dad’s not only picked up on, but he seems to think it’s something I’ve done.
