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Oh. She wanted to talk to me? Haina noticed me watching her? I'm partially horrified that I've been so obvious and partially thrilled that she's seen me. "I like aliens."
"So many of your kind don't, and I don't blame you." She gives a little grimace. "It's one reason I have this route, you know. Lord va'Rin requested more pleasant personalities from his vendors. No idea how someone like Pendar slipped through the cracks."
"Maybe he's pleasant for a praxiian." They're a rather vicious, warlike people.
Her eyes widen and Haina grunts. "Come to think of it, you might be right." She falls silent as the bartender arrives with two drinks and food, and her hand casually covers mine. It's like…we're holding hands. Like we really are a couple. I know it's just pretend, but this isn't helping my crush in the slightest. We continue to hold hands as he tosses down two baskets of food in front of us and then sets down two strong-smelling beers. Or rather, “brews” as the aliens call them.
"Service with a smile," she teases, grinning up at the bartender.
He huffs with amusement and shakes his head at us. Even this curmudgeon likes Haina. I think it'd be impossible not to like her.
He walks away and she continues to watch me. I stare back, memorizing her features. Her brow is covered with the thick plating that skims up to her horns, and this close her cheekbones are almost sharp. It gives her a pixie-like look…if pixies were seven-foot-tall blue aliens with massive biceps.
"You can eat now," she says gently.
Oh. Oh lord, I'm just sitting here beaming at her and holding her hand and she's waiting for me to let go. I feel like an idiot. Snatching my hand away, I scoop up one of the avaashi—a doughy sort of ball made with a vegetable paste—and nibble on it. The texture is weird, but I've had worse.
Haina pops one entire avaashi into her mouth and licks her thumb. "So, what's the rest of your name? I only heard it once and I didn't remember all of it. Just the “Ali” part because it's pretty."
My face heats again. She remembered my name? Or at least, most of it? "I like Ali better."
"Are you just saying that because I called you Ali?" She gives me a knowing look, her mouth quirking in another smile.
"No, I actually prefer Ali. My full name is Aliette but I hate it. It feels…fussy."
"And you're not fussy?"
"I'm easy." Another blush scalds my face as I realize what I've said. "I mean, I like things when they're easy. I like simple. Not that I'm easy."
Haina keeps smiling at me and I wait for her to make a joke at my expense, but she only puts her hand on the table again and extends a pinky over to me. I know without her saying anything that it's for me to lace my finger with hers, and I do so, my heart thrumming with an excited pitter-patter.
"So, I was right with Ali. Good to know. My name is Haina Haal Ui." Her last name sounds familiar. Before I can ask about it, she continues. "Haal Ui's a station. When you're an abandoned bastard, the only surname you get is that of the station itself."
"Oh…I'm sorry."
"I'm not. It's just life." She shrugs. "It made me independent and maybe a little bit pushy." Her mouth quirks in another one of those charming smiles. "Which I should also be apologizing for. I all but mauled you in front of that praxiian, and I hope it wasn't too offensive. The only thing I could think of to get him off your case without causing a scene was to pretend that you were mine."
"You didn't offend me." I want to say more. Gosh, I want to say so much more, but that awkward shyness hits me again. Someone as confident and appealing as Haina wouldn't want a goofy confession from someone like me. Maybe she doesn't even like women.
But as we stare at each other, she slowly pulls her hand back. "I'm not so sure I didn't bother you," Haina says carefully. She watches my face and then shakes her head. "I swear I won't bother you again."
With a sinking feeling, I realize that my reticence is making Haina suspect the worst. That I secretly am offended by her touch. That she did push too far, and my silence isn't helping. That if I don't say something, this might be the last time I ever talk to her. I have to speak. I have to say something. Anything.
"I love you," I blurt out.
Her eyes widen.
I gasp, clapping my hands over my mouth. "Oh my god. I'm so sorry—"
She raises a hand in the air. "Only apologize if you didn't mean it, Ali. Otherwise, you haven't hurt my feelings." Her smile returns, flashing and charming. "I'm flattered, actually."
My face feels like an inferno. "I have a hard t-time saying what I'm t-thinking," I stammer. "Too many years a slave." When I was stolen away from Earth, I was never the bravest creature, and years of cruel masters and being treated like less than a person taught me to keep my head down and my mouth closed. Haina's expression turns to one of worry, and I feel the need to keep speaking. So I spill everything. "I like you. I want you to know that. I like everything about you. I like your laugh and your smile and the way you're nice to everyone. I like that you seem strong and capable but kind, too. I like that your eyes light up when you're happy. You're right that I keep coming by the store. I just like being around you. I want to be near you, even if it's only watching you from afar."
Haina says nothing. She leans in, and instinctively, I lean in closer to her as well. Her smile disappears and she brushes her thumb over one side of my forehead. "You hit your head."
"Sled crash," I remind her.
Her mouth flattens and she scowls. "I need to go beat the fur off of that praxiian."
