AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Decker found me through a co-worker that had hired me to do a side-job. Sought me out, I said no. Then we bumped into each other at a wedding last weekend and long story short, he is very convincing.”
“Convincing? How so?”
“He’s just really nice. Like—a super guy. Otherwise, I would have told him to piss off and be on his way.”
I clamp my lips shut. Here I am trying to be classy, throwing out phrases like ‘piss off.’ What am I going to do next, drop a few F Bombs?
Ari crosses—then uncrosses her legs. “What kind of side-job? Like posting for them on social media or…” her voice trails off.
Shit.
Do I actually tell her I fed a man lines at a funeral so he could scam his way into a woman’s’ heart? When I say the words in my head it sounds worse than it was. Or was it as bad as it sounds?
“Not exactly.” I take a healthy chug of the wine in my glass then motion for the bartender to pour another.
I have a feeling I’m going to need it, and probably some actual food, too, so I don’t get tipsy.
But tipsy isn’t always a bad thing…
“How exactly?” She pins me with a stare I imagine she uses on male counterparts when she’s trying to make a point, or get the upper hand. I don’t blame her, considering that Decker and I pulled a bait and switch.
I lean back against the back of the barstool I’m sitting on, wine glass in one hand, the other waving about the air as I begin my story.
“It’s actually really funny. My brother is friends with this guy named Palmer—who works with Decker. Palmer knew I was freelancing.” What a nice way for me to say I’m broke and needed money. “Anyway. Palmer had a loss in the family and one of his fears is public speaking—he hired me to talk him through the eulogy.”
It takes Ari a few seconds to make sense of all this in her brain before the questions catch up.
“Wait. What do you mean, he hired you to talk him through the eulogy? Were you like, consoling him on the sidelines?”
“No. I was literally telling him what to say in his ear.”
And making him cry, the insensitive bastard, by putting menthol in his eyes.
“Telling him what to say?”
I nod. “Yes, feeding him the lines.”
Her lips part. “But…couldn’t he just write a speech like a normal person would?”
One would think. “I think he wanted to look like he was winging it and had a way with words.”
“At a funeral.” Ari deadpans. “That makes no sense.”
Ya think?
“Who was this guy?”
I shrug. “A friend of my brothers. Total prep, spoiled rich kid, wanted to impress his new girlfriend.”
“Pause.” Ari holds a hand up. “Wanted to impress his new girlfriend?” Silence. “At a funeral?”
I nod.
“Impress her how?”
Let me see, how do I put this? “Erm. By pretending to be sensitive and emotional, I guess?”
“He needed you to make him look sensitive and emotional?”
