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And that scares me just as much as it sends a jolt of excitement into my core.
Chapter16
Finn
“Judge Mattingly? This is Finn Crowley, how are you?” I stand on my balcony, phone pressed to my ear.
Mattingly does not sound happy. It’s never a good thing when a Crowley calls. “Hello, Finn, I hope everything is going well.”
“I’m reaching out because I need a wedding license.”
Mattingly is quiet for a long moment. He’s a Crowley judge, meaning he takes the envelopes stuffed with cash without question, and occasionally does the family favors. However, normally these calls come from my father, and I can tell it makes him uncomfortable speaking to me instead.
“Well, those are simple enough, if you go to the courthouse—”
“I need one today. I need it made official by this evening.”
He clears his throat. “There are waits. Legally mandated—”
“Backdate the paperwork as necessary. I can count on you, right, judge? I’ll bring my future wife to your office this evening at five.”
“I, ah, I have court, but—”
“I’ll see you then.” I hang up before he can make more excuses.
I pace back and forth, head running through all the reasons why this is a bad idea, but unable to stop myself. Last night, when I saw her lying in bed, lips moving, mumbling to herself in her sleep, she looked so fucking beautiful and vulnerable, and I made up my mind on the spot.
In ten years, I see myself with Dara, raising our child together.
I don’t love the girl.
I’m not even sure I like her.
She’s beautiful, yes, and I’m physically attracted to her, absolutely, but she’s not the kind of girl I pictured would become my wife. She’s not a part of our world, not used to the pressures of being a Crowley.
She’s not stone cold, like Robin.
But that’s also what attracts me to her. She’s not the normal kind of woman that would want to be a part of this lifestyle, and there’s some voice in my head that thinks it would be good for me, having her around. Good for her too. At least financially.
If I’m doing this, I have to do it the right way. I can’t just marry Dara and blow everything up, even if that’s what I want to do.
Instead, I have one more call before I can push ahead.
Robin’s phone rings a few times. I’m worried she won’t answer until the line clicks alive and her voice comes through. “Finley,” she says, using my real name, which pisses me off. “I didn’t expect you to ever actually call. I figured we wouldn’t speak until our wedding day.” She pauses. “I preferred it that way.”
“Where are you right now?” I say, practically growling at her.
“Home, at my father’s place. I’m having a tennis lesson.” That explains the thumping sound in the background. “Why do you ask?”
I grit my teeth. Her father’s place is two hours away. I don’t have time to go meet her in person. “How badly did you want to get married?”
She laughs lightly. “On a scale of one to ten? Ten being ecstatic? Negative fifty thousand. No offense.”
“None taken. How upset would you be if our engagement fell through?”
She pauses for a long time. I almost think she’s gone, except I can still her someone whacking tennis balls in the background. “I wouldn’t be personally upset,” she says finally. “Although my father will be, and I suspect your father will be as well. What are you up to, Finley?”
“Stop calling me that,” I say, grimacing at my own weakness. Snapping at her right now isn’t going to help, and it doesn’t matter what she calls me.
