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Now, looking back, I can see how I misunderstood.
His family wraps itself in legitimacy. They have so much money, it must be easy to make it seem as though they’re regular old rich folks. Except Finn’s not regular, far from regular, and he tried to get me to understand it over and over.
Now, it’s so obvious, it makes me want to scream.
Finn’s a killer and always was.
That way he’d been behaving? That was him doing his best to seem normal.
Thisis the real Finn.
“What now?” I ask, forcing myself not to tremble.
Does this change how I feel?
“Now we keep on waiting.” Genna looks at her nails smugly. “But I suspect he’ll be here soon.”
I chew on my cheek, tugging at my hair. “Now I’m not sure if I want him to come pick me up or not.”
Genna’s eyes snap up, narrowing. “You’re not getting cold feet, are you?”
“I didn’t know he’s actually commit—” I stop myself, glancing at the kitchen door, and mouthmurder.
Genna rolls her eyes. “Not the first time, hon.”
“Don’t be so cavalier.”
“McLaren deserved it. The old asshole knew what he was getting into when he decided to mess with Finn. Are you really upset about this?”
I lean against the counter, trying to assess how I feel, thinking back to being with Finn, to how it was when we were together.
To the promises we made. To his mouth against mine.
And I don’t feel sorry that McLaren’s dead. I pity his family, in the same way I pitied Lucas, but I wouldn’t go back and save his life if I could.
Just like I’m happy Lucas got a taste of his own assholishness.
A terrible understanding washes over me.
I overlooked so much. Finn is cold, a killer, a monster wearing a lovely suit, a predator hiding in plain sight, stalking through the world, taking what he wants with his stately bearing.
And I fell for it.
I fell hard for that ruthless bastard.
“You know what’s sick?” I ask quietly, forcing myself to stay calm. “I don’t think I am. Shocked, but not upset.”
“There you go,” Genna says, nodding like that’s a completely normal reaction.
“I think I need a therapist.”
“Nah, you’re good.” She hops to her feet. “Come on, let’s go to the mall.”
“I thought you said the mall smells like the underside of a public bus.”
“I said the mall smells like an abandoned shoe store. The movie theater smells like the bus.”
“Gotcha. Okay, well, let me grab my stuff.”
