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There was her voice.
That sweet smile that seemed to light up her skin and fill him with light too.
The softness of her hair.
And that hollow at the base of her neck. It was exactly the right size for his thumb, and he liked to rest it there, feeling her pulse.
His hand twitched and he wondered what she would do if he reached over and cupped her head and held her like that now and for ever—
For ever?
The words hovered in the cool cabin air, dancing in front of his eyes like light reflecting off water, and he felt a calmness that was also a kind of euphoria.For ever with Dove.Waking with her every day and taking her into his bed every night and all the hours in between...
But what was he thinking?
His chest tightened. There was no ‘for ever’ for him and Dove. How could there be? She knew him too well to want anything beyond these few days and nights they had set aside to say goodbye properly. That was all he had to offer. And it was the least he could do to make up for the appalling way he had treated her.
For all the appalling things in her life.
He stared out of the window, his throat closing over. Listening to her talk about her parents’ marriage, he had felt numb with shame and self-loathing. All the time they’d been together, and all the years that had followed, when he had condemned her without trial, right up to the moment when he had bullied her into working for him, he had been so certain that he alone had suffered.
But Dove had been hurting all this time. Everything he’d thought he’d known about her was wrong. She had suffered too.
And then there was the acquisition. Dove was right. Things were different now. He wasn’t a penniless young man any more. He was fully grown, and very wealthy and successful.
His fingers tapped out a rhythm on the armrest. But she was wrong about other things. Outwardly he might have changed, but inside everything had stayed the same. The wound of his mother’s rejection was as raw now as it had been seven years ago. And he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t go and talk to Fenella. He couldn’t put himself in the position of being rejected again.
Unlike Dove.
Remembering how she had hidden away onThe Argentumand confronted him, he stilled his fingers. She was brave in a way he simply couldn’t be. That was why things had to be done his way. So that he could leave Fenella Ogilvy and James Balfour behind for ever. It was what he had been working towards for almost a third of his life.
‘What is it?’
He glanced up. Dove was staring at him, her grey eyes resting on his face, her expression a mix of confusion and concern.
‘Nothing,’ he lied. ‘I was just thinking about which show we could go to.’
He knew she was worried about him. Knew, too, that she had agreed to stay because of the way he had spoken about his mother. He had seen the shock and fear in her eyes, and it sickened him that he’d scared her.
What he wanted was to take care of her, to protect her. Except that wouldn’t work because he wanted to protect her from men like himself and her father. Men who were damaged irretrievably. Men whose anger at the world made them forget the rules.
‘We don’t have to do a show. I mean, we probably won’t be able to get tickets at such short notice.’
‘Don’t worry about that. In fact, don’t worry about anything. Just leave everything to me.’
He leaned forward and cupped the back of her head in his hand, his pulse jerking as he fitted his thumb into the hollow there. They had only been in the air an hour, and they had made love multiple times before they’d left. The last time he had dragged her upstairs to the bedroom, lifting her against the door, both of them panting and fully clothed. But, he wanted her still—always.
Leaning forward, he pulled her towards him, tilting her head up to meet his, fitting his mouth to hers. Her fingers fluttered against his arms and he knew that she wanted what he wanted.
They made it to the cabin, mouths fusing, hands pulling at each other as they fell onto the bed.
Somewhere nearby a phone started ringing. Not his, but he could feel Dove tensing. Groaning, he reached over and picked up the phone, frowning down at the screen. ‘It’s your mother.’
She hesitated. ‘It’s probably nothing. She just likes to catch up. I’ll call her back.’
Her mouth found his as the ringing stopped and he pulled her closer, his fingers loosening around the phone as everything else tightened.
He swore under his breath as the ringing started again. But, catching sight of Dove’s face, he tamped down his hunger.
