Page 21 of Love Me Like You Do


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I racked my brain for a way to put a stop to the onslaught. “Mercy! I call mercy!” I finally remembered the childhood word that ended any fight.

I tensed, but no more flour came at me.

“I don’t think she can handle us,” Harrison said to Wren.

“I think you’re trying to scare me off. You want me to move back to my apartment.” I didn’t like the thought of going back to my apartment where I drank tea alone in the morning while thinking of how I’d fill my day.

I sneaked a peek at Wren, whose eyes were wide. “We like you here.”

“I was just teasing you.” I couldn’t resist reaching out and brushing the flour off her cheek.

Harrison let me go. “Why don’t you two rinse off, and I’ll take care of the kitchen.”

I missed the warmth of his body and the protection of his arms. After my dad left, I never felt secure. I kept waiting for something else bad to happen. The fear only increased when things were good.

“You want to take a shower?” I asked Wren, holding my hand out to her.

She pulled her wet shirt off her chest. “I’d better.”

“Was that a new Sunday tradition?” I teased as we climbed the steps.

Wren laughed, letting her head fall back. I let the sound of it wrap around my heart. Finally, she recovered and shook her head. “No. That was crazy.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at that. “I just want to be prepared.”

Wren paused at the top of the steps, looking like she was thinking carefully about her answer. “We mess around but nothing like that. My dad’s comfortable with you.”

So, they were different with me here. I wondered if that would continue, or if my being here was a novelty that would wear off like the shine of a new toy.

“You need help in the shower?” I asked when we reached the hallway bathroom.

“I got it. Thanks,” Wren said sweetly as she closed the door.

I continued down the hall past the guest room and into the master, which was now mine, too. I grabbed new sweats and a T-shirt before starting the shower.

As the warm water rinsed away the flour, I couldn’t help but think it was the best Sunday I’d had in forever, and we hadn’t even eaten yet. My chest felt full and my limbs light. I was happy.

After my dad left, I’d always characterized it in my mind as before and after. That’s how Mom referenced his leaving, too. Things were different before, and they’d never be the same after. I’d been living in that state of expectant anticipation of something else bad happening ever since.

But maybe moving in with Harrison was a good thing. Maybe he and Wren would show me what it was like to live again. To relish each moment and be present. The entire time I was cuddling with Wren on the couch, watching cartoons, or nestled in Harrison’s arms, squeezing my eyes shut against the onslaught of flour, I hadn’t thought about anything else other than being in the moment.

I closed my eyes as I turned my face into the stream of water, smiling when I thought of how freeing it had been to watch Wren and Harrison let go. Wren had said something like that hadn’t happened before, but I had a feeling that wasn’t true. Even when I was around, they laughed and teased each other.

I’d just never been included in the wrestling matches or water fights. I’d always been more of a spectator. But now, I was part of their family, and fake or not, it felt real. Being included in their little family of two was nice.

It made me long to have a family of my own. Was it possible for me to let go and hope that person wouldn’t eventually walk away? It seemed impossible to ever take that leap. That’s why I kept myself so closed off from any possibilities. And if Harrison left, I’d lose my best friend.

I was making new friends with the wedding planners of Happily Ever Afters, but they were slowly pairing off, too. Lily had Jake, and Abby had Nick. Soon, everyone would settle down and have kids, and I’d still be afraid to take that step. I was afraid to live my life.

I wrapped my arms around my stomach, wanting to protect myself. If I wanted this thing with Harrison and Wren to work, I needed to let go of my reservations. Besides, this might be my only chance to experience what it would be like to truly be with someone.

I didn’t think I’d ever let go enough to marry someone, much less bring a child into the world. I couldn’t set up my child for the same pain I’d experienced.

I quickly toweled off and dressed. By the time I returned to the kitchen, there were a few pancakes on a plate on the island, and Wren was pouring syrup on hers.

“You’re just in time,” Harrison said.

“The kitchen looks great,” I said as I sat on the stool next to Wren.

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