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Caroline checks her phone. There’s a text from Dylan:Meet me at Cru later if you can?
OMG,she thinks. Does Dylan actually want to link?
K,she responds.Depends what time the fun ends here.She adds the laugh-crying emoji.
Hearing from Dylan is a boost, but there’s nothing from Isaac. TheI miss youtext is just dangling there, a bad judgment call. He probably deleted it as soon as it came in. She’s aching to send another text, something about what she’s filmed so far. She is, after all, using his equipment. And the material is so much better than she expected.
Tatum returns to the table, followed by Dru-Ann, Gigi, and finally Caroline. Hollis gets a second wind. The evening can’t end yet—the food was impeccable, and the conversation was spicier than she expected, but what about fun? Can she make this fun? When “American Girl” by Tom Petty starts playing through the speakers, Hollis turns up the volume.
Brooke shrieks, “I love this song!”
In so many ways, this song was Hollis’s anthem growing up. She sings out,“She couldn’t help thinking that there was a little more to life somewhere else!”
In another second, everyone starts dancing on the deck. Caroline can’t pretend to be surprised; she knew this was coming. The follow-up song is the Romantics’ “What I Like About You,” and Brooke bops her head from one shoulder to the other in a way that must hurt her neck.
Dru-Ann pours another round of shots for everyone.Really, is this necessary?Caroline wonders. It’s nearly eleven o’clock now. How much gas is left in the tank here? She wants to go into town to meet Dylan.
The song changes to “I’m Still Standing,” by Elton John. Brooke raises her arms over her head and shimmies her hips and the rest of the stars form a circle around her, their unlikely hero. Caroline wonders if she can quietly slip out. Would anyone notice (well, her mother would notice) and would she miss anything important?
The next song in the queue is “Take My Breath Away” by Berlin, which brings a totally different vibe.
“Everyone backward-skate!” Dru-Ann shouts.
What does that even mean?Caroline wonders.
Hollis reaches for Tatum’s hand, and the two of them spin, twirl, and dip. Dru-Ann grabs Brooke, who is so smashed she simply clutches Dru-Ann around the middle and rests her head against her chest.
What have I done?Dru-Ann thinks. Dru-Ann and Brooke shuffle in a tight circle and an unwelcome memory pops into Dru-Ann’s mind: a seventh-grade dance with a boy named Philip Price. The song then was “Stairway to Heaven,” eight minutes of torture—or of ecstasy, if you were Philip Price pressing your thirteen-year-old erection into Dru-Ann’s leg.
Caroline focuses the camera on Gigi as she sits at the table watching the other women dance. Gigi’s expression is neutral; she doesn’t seem hurt or offended that she’s a fifth wheel, and she doesn’t fidget or check her phone or pick at the remaining cobbler, which is right in front of her. Instead, she remains so present and serene she might be a painting. Her gold necklaces glint in the candlelight; the breeze off the beach lifts her bangs off her forehead.What could she be thinking?Caroline wonders.
Gigi feels like a villain of literary proportions. She’s Lady Macbeth. She’s the narrator from “The Tell-Tale Heart.” Her guilt pounds in her ears, stains her skin. How can the others not see it, hear it?
She longs to come clean. She fantasizes about interrupting the music, making an announcement—I was Matthew’s mistress!—then dramatically exiting through the glass sliders while the others stare after her in shock and confusion. It would be hideous, yes, but also cleansing, cathartic. The yoke of guilt biting into her shoulder would be lifted.
She imagines visiting the Hungry with Hollis website before she goes to bed. A Kitchen Light will appear here, at Hollis’s Nantucket house. Gigi will write on the Corkboard:
To the Hungry with Hollis Community:
My name is Gigi Ling, and I’ve been interacting with all of you under false pretenses. I led you to believe I was enthusiastic about banana bread and bouillabaisse, but really, I came here because I was conducting a love affair with Hollis Shaw’s husband, Dr. Matthew Madden, and I was curious about the woman whom I saw as my rival. After Matthew died, Hollis and I became so close that she invited me to her home for her Five-Star Weekend.
I realize some of you might not care about the interpersonal drama, and to those of you, I say: Hollis served grilled swordfish with avocado sauce, fresh baguettes with butter she churned herself, and a peach cobbler with a hot sugar crust. Hollis Shaw is the genuine article.
I, however, am not.
What would Molly Beardsley of Twain Harte, California, think of that? How about Bailey Ruckert from Baton Rouge? Gigi wonders which of Hollis’s subscribers would cast stones. Nearly all of them, she assumes, though she’s curious if there are any out there who might offer mercy, empathy, understanding.
It hardly matters. Gigi is too much of a coward to reveal herself.
18. First Light II
Caroline gets to Cru at midnight. Dylan meets her at the podium, looking smoking hot in a navy button-down, a navy blazer, and jeans. He leads her to a seat at the front bar and asks if champagne is okay.
“Obviously,” she says.
A coupe glass of Pol Roger appears, and as Caroline sips it, she wishes Isaac could see her. She considers taking a selfie and texting it to him, but that feels childish and predictable. She considers taking a selfie and posting it to her Instagram stories—Isaac pretends not to have time for social media, though Caroline knows he creeps on her account occasionally—but does she want to bethatgirl, taking selfies and posting them? She does not. She tries to channel Gigi Ling. She will be present: Sip her champagne, admire the deft handiwork of the oyster shucker on the other side of the bar, listen to the music (“Kids” by MGMT). She assumes Sofia is back at the clubs and Isaac is in the loft alone, maybe waiting for his DoorDash from Momoya, maybe working, maybe watchingMy Octopus Teacherfor the umpteenth time (he says he finds something new to admire about the film with every viewing). Should Caroline step outside and call him?
She should not. Dylan appears; he’s ready to go. He asks the barback for “wine on wheels,” and the barback hands him a fresh bottle of Pol Roger and two plastic cups. He and Caroline head down Straight Wharf to the parking lot. “Your chariot awaits,” Dylan says, and he opens the passenger door of his monster truck.
