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She chuckles and shrugs, but it’s not a goofy, fun-loving chuckle. It’s that terrible kind that makes you wonder what you’re missing. “I just don’t understand, Phillip. You’re a freaking billionaire. What does a year of pay even matter to someone like you?”
“Millions of dollars. That’s why it matters.”
She stands up and shrugs. “It’s your company, Phillip. Do what you want, I guess. I just… I thought you’d be different. That’s all.”
She turns and walks away from me, leaving me seething. How can she suggest that I just not get paid for six months? How can she, a person who’s spent her life counting every penny, think that my pennies don’t matter? Much less, millions of dollars.
I watch her walk away, and I don’t have words for how I feel. Most business owners would have squeezed even more out of them, but I haven’t. I’ve spent my life trying to do the right thing for all of them. No one was mistreated. Now this? My company is trying to make me into a bad guy because I need them to work a little harder.
I could handle that, though. They’ve always thought of me as terrifying, as the man who could make or break careers. But Addison? I’ve never been that in her eyes. There’s never been a single moment where she looked at me with the same fear, or even worse, looking at me like I’m disappointing her. Thinking that she’s seeing me that way cuts me more than anything I’ve ever experienced.
But I’m not doing anything wrong. I’m not taking advantage of anyone. The only thing I’m doing is trying to keep my company afloat when the entire industry is failing.
She doesn’t see that, though.
Forty-Nine
ADDISON
I stareat the computer screen, unable to do my job. I keep flashing back to how Phillip felt last night at dinner. Felt really is the only word that makes sense. It’s not that he said anything wrong or even had a tone. He justfeltlike he was pissed.
And I trust those feelings.
He tried talking to me about random things. We watched a movie I completely ignored. Then we fell asleep on opposite sides of the bed. I have never felt so alone in bed with another person.
I glance at my phone when a text message comes through.
Phillip Loughton
I emailed you my edits. I can’t eat lunch with you today.
Of course, he can’t. He hasn’t been able to eat lunch with me in what seems like forever. I told myself that I would be patient, that I knew things would be hard at first when he went back to his old position. Then his father dropped the rest of the company on his shoulders, and there are all the recent changes he’s instituting. He’s got a lot on his plate.
He just doesn’t feel like himself these days. There’s that word again. Feels. He does such a good job hiding what’s going on in that head of his. Then again, it might just be because I see him so rarely.
I open my personal email on my phone and open my manuscript. It’s covered in comments. When did he have time to do this? Did he really edit my entire manuscript in two days? Is that what he’s been doing the whole time?
I read through the comments, and by the end of page two, I feel like I’m about to cry. He ripped it apart. Damn near every paragraph has serious commentary.
There’s no way I can go through this right now. Not with how low I feel. I was sure this book was good. Angela and Donovan were amazing, but this… This does not feel like I wrote a good book.
I stand up, and Sera turns around in her seat. “You getting some pre-lunch coffee? Because I could definitely use some.”
I shake my head. “I’m going to take the rest of the day off,” I say.
She frowns. I’ve never taken any time off, much less leave before lunch. “I just need an afternoon off.”
“Are you feeling sick?”
I shake my head again. “Nope. I just need some space away from this place for an afternoon.” My eyes go toward the elevator that leads to the top floor, where Phillip is probably in the middle of a heated discussion about the future of the company.
Sera hesitates, but then she says, “Need some company? I don’t think I’ve taken a day off since I started here. I must have a whole quarter worth of sick days saved up.”
It’s tempting, but I don’t think I’m ready to talk about the way I’m feeling. Plus, Phillip keeps saying that everything’s about to get better. Maybe I’m just being emotional. Patience has never really been one of my strong suits.
“No, I think I’d prefer to be alone. Thanks though.”
She nods and turns back to the computer. “Feel better, Addison,” she says. “Whatever it is, it’s probably not as bad as you think it is.”
