Page 43 of Real Regrets


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Crew nods. “Thanks.”

I inhale. “I’m sorry, Crew. For what I said to you…and for what I said to Scarlett. It was way, way over the line.”

He nods again, this time slower. “I’m not going to lie; it pissed me off at the time. But, I’m sorry too. I know I said my life wouldn’t change after I got married. If it makes any difference, I thought me and Scarlett would just be on paper. Things changed.”

“You don’t have to explain anything to me. You never owed me any explanation.”

Crew studies me, but there’s nothing sexual about his appraisal. It feels more like he’s checking me over, making sure I’m okay. “Jeff and I just stopped here because it was on the way. Glad to know it’s endorsed by a local.” He nods toward the bag I’m holding.

“Yeah, the food here is great.”

I’m not sure what else to say to Crew now that I’ve apologized. There was never much substance between us. I don’t even know what kind of sandwich he’d order from a place like this.

“You’re here for work?”

The question has nothing to do with Crew. I’m fishing for information about Kensington Consolidated because of Oliver, curious about the company he’s so devoted to.

“Uh, yeah.” Suddenly, he looks a little uncomfortable. “Speaking of which, I’d better get back to Jeff. We’re on a tight timetable.” Crew pauses. “Take care, Hannah.”

“You too.”

We share a smile, and then Crew walks back over toward the man he walked in with.

I head out the door, turning the interaction over in my mind as I walk down the sidewalk toward the baby store down the street. It’s where I got the duckling onesie for Eddie and April’s baby, and where I’ll hopefully be able to find them a more original gift.

Seeing Crew was strange, and not just because of Oliver. It was a relief to apologize, although Scarlett is really who I owe one to. I’ve changed since the last time I saw him, and so has he. Any familiarity that existed between us was erased a long time ago.

It’s a relief to fully realize that, but impossible to forget everything that’s happened. I’m married to his brother, which tangles the past with the present.

I check my phone again. Still nothing from Oliver.

Both of the saleswomen in the baby store are busy helping other customers when I walk in, so I start browsing in the front. There’s a large selection of strollers. That wasn’t a shower gift, and I realize why when I check the price tag on one.

I move on to the toys section. There’s a plush duckling that would match the onesie I already gave them. And then practically every other animal is piled on the shelves as well. It’s an overwhelming selection.

I’m petting a stuffed pig when my phone rings. I lean against the display of pacifiers and pull it out of my pocket.

My stomach twists itself into a knot asOliver Kensingtonflashes across the screen.

“Hi,” I answer. “Can I give you a call back in like fifteen minutes? I’m shopping for baby stuff.”

“Baby stuff?”

My body reacts to the sound of his deep voice in a way I resent. I know I’m attracted to Oliver. But it wasn’t supposed to be this lasting, overwhelming interest that fills my stomach with butterflies.

“Yeah. My sister-in-law is pregnant, and my shower gift was lame. I’m trying to find something better for when the baby is actually born.”

There’s a long pause. Then, “Do they have any nursery rockers?”

“What?”

“An elephant or a giraffe. Maybe a hippo?”

I spin in a circle, scanning the store. “Um, they have a lamb? Or a unicorn.”

“Do they know what they’re having?”

It takes me too long to answer, totally thrown by the direction of our conversation. “No.”

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