AllFreeNovel
Share Us
one
Joshua
“I can’t believeyou’re doing this.”
My best friend and roommate, Rob, follows me into my bedroom. My pile of clean laundry sits on my bed, waiting to be packed. It’s hard to pack for three months knowing that I can’t just run to the mall to pick up something new. When I’m on location, it’s no big deal, but this time tomorrow I’ll be married and confined to a house with no outside contact.
“I don’t have a choice,” I remind him.
“You were drunk. We both were. What we say and sign under the influence should not count.”
Except it does and it’s binding. Most producers run to the hills, waving their newly inked contracts around when something like this happens. As an actor, you shut up and do your job.
“What’s done is done. Matt already tried to get me out of the show, and short of claiming that I have some disease, which will ruin my career, there’s no reason I can’t fulfill my obligation.”
“We were set up!”
I wave him off. Yes, we were drunk. Yes, I feel as if I were duped. After trying desperately to get out of the contract, only to be told repeatedly that it’s binding, I gave in. Once I let the idea settle in, it stuck with me. I have nothing to lose by going onMarried Blind—quite the opposite really. I can use my fame and fans to deliver a public good message. If we win, it’s one million in our pockets, my wife’s and mine. We’ll split it and go our separate ways. My lawyer still thinks it’s a risk and encouraged me to file an injunction against the producer because he fears that I’m going to get stuck with some clinger who’ll want some of my fortune. That won’t happen because there will be no sex involved. It’ll be the two of us and some simple game playing. We’ll woo the TV viewers with my charm and hopefully her good looks. My female fans are going to hate that I’ve done this, but I’ll be sure to give them a lot of shirtless screen time to make up for it. They just have to remember it’s only for three months.
“Some brilliant ideas happen when people are drunk,” I say as I watch Rob’s face morph into something indescribable. Before he moved to Los Angeles, he was a character actor and most of the time can make me laugh. This is not one of those times. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t be in this position right now.
“You know you could leave, catch a flight somewhere.”
Ignoring Rob, I continue to pack. It’s a chore that I hate, but this time I’m taking my time to fold my shirts nicely, making sure my jeans aren’t rolled into a disastrous ball, and even separating my underwear and socks. I don’t want my new wife to think I’m a slob, even though the state of my apartment confirms that I am.
“What about a non-disclosure agreement?”
I shake my head, causing Rob to throw his hands up in the air in frustration. Matt and Jason are going to their graves prematurely.
“I see your acting lessons are paying off.” Rob is what Hollywood considers a B-list actor. He gets minor parts here and there, but hasn’t been considered for anything major. That’s all me. After one small part that turned into an Oscar nomination for Best Supporting Actor, my career has skyrocketed. Matt Stokes is my agent. He’s older, sophisticated, and works amazing deals for me. Jason MacNicholl is my lawyer. He’s young, resilient, and a workhorse. He’s currently having a mild heart attack because I refuse to have my future bride sign a non-disclosure agreement. I can’t have one signed. We can’t do it before the ceremony because that will give away my identity and once we’re married, it’ll be too late. I’ve assured them both that we won’t be consummating the relationship, so there shouldn’t be anything to worry about.
“I’m trying to look out for you,” he says with a shake of his head. “I just don’t get why you’re doing this.”
I set down my shirt and sit on the edge of my bed. This all started late last fall. Rob and I had met for a few drinks and ran into Barry Barnett, one of the producers from the reality show. The more the drinks flowed, the more Rob started joking about me submitting my name for the next season. I laughed him off until Barry insinuated I didn’t have what it takes to compete. I didn’t take too kindly to that and Barry told me to prove it. I let it go, but the drinks continued to flow and then my on again/mostly off again girlfriend, Jules, showed up and started acting like we were together, which we hadn’t been for a while. She laughed when I told her I was going on the show to find real love, but stormed out of the restaurant once I took the pen from Barry. She never saw me sign on the dotted line.
I never thought in a million years Barry would hold me to it, but he has. I have a feeling that with my celebrity status they’d enjoy the rating increase, but having me on is a liability. Yes, their viewership could double or triple, but unless they follow me up with another celeb in the next season, they will lose that market.
I’m doing this for one reason––well, two actually. Aside from my contractual obligation, I’m going to use my time on television to talk about my charity. When I got my first big break, I helped revamp the community center where I grew up. Yes, I grew up in a community center. I had three meals a day, someone to help me with my homework, and people to listen to me when I needed them. I have parents, but until they divorced, they did nothing but fight. What kid wants to listen to their parents fight every single day? Not me, that’s for sure. So each day before and after school, I biked over to Valley Hill Community Center. I thought after my parents split, things would get better. They didn’t. They both remarried and found new hobbies to occupy their time. They’ve both since divorced and remarried multiple times. It’s all I know. That’s why I can take this so lightly. Marriages, especially in Hollywood, are a dime a dozen.
“I’m doing this because being married for three months without any outside interference is going to be easy. This girl and I are going to walk away with five hundred thousand each and Valley Hill will be front and center on everyone’s mind. I’ll have ample airtime to talk about it, and maybe people in the community will see what a gem it is and help fix it up. Jason only lets me donate so much to them a year, so after I win, the Center will have enough for some major renovations.”
“You’re going to have a wife.”
“It’s a showmance at best.”
“She’ll develop feelings for you.”
Not gonna happen. “There’s no way. I’ll tell her the moment we’re off camera that this is nothing but a business transaction. Hell, for her it’s a chance to say she was married to an actor for three months and she made some money out of the deal.”
Rob turns to leave, lingering in my doorway. “Jules is flipping out. And you’re making your future wife sound like a gold-digging whore.”
“Jules has no say in what I do.” It’s been all too convenient that she’s been away filming and we haven’t been able to talk face-to-face about me leaving.
“Does she know that?”
I shrug, not caring how Jules feels. “She left me for someone else, and when he wasn’t good enough, she came back thinking I’m a revolving door. We’re toxic together, you know that.”
Rob stares at me for a minute before shaking his head. “Everything about this is bad for you. Take my advice and talk to Jules before you leave, get your head straight, and treat this new wife of yours with respect while you’re living in that house. Remember, your legion of fans will be watching and they probably have this crazy idea that you’re a stand-up guy.”
