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Mamma’s arms wrapped around me a second later. She led me to a chair and drew me into her lap like she used to when I was younger. Her hand stroked over my hair as she held me, not saying anything.
I choked through the story again, telling my parents what I could remember of what Dr. Hazel had told me. And then we sat there in the kitchen for what could have been hours. I knew they shared my grief, just like I knew there was nothing any of us could say that would make a difference. It would take time, and my parents would be there through all of it.
“For what it’s worth, I think you and Sam make a cute couple,” Mamma said sometime later.
I snorted at her choice of words. She had to be the only person in the world who’d call Samcute. Or maybe it was just a mom thing. Sam might seem older to me, but from her point of view, he was only in his late twenties.
“I doubt Nacio would agree with you,” I said.
She gave me an unimpressed look. “I didn’t realize your love life was Nacio’s decision to make.”
“It’s not. I just figured you’d take his side since he was the one who knew Sam first.”
Mamma shook her head with a chuckle. “I love your brother, but he can be incredibly stubborn and pigheaded sometimes. And he’s particularly protective when it comes to you.” She smiled wistfully. “You should have seen him the first time he held you. He was only six years old, but the way he looked at you was as serious as a heart attack.”
“What’s your point?”
“That while Nacio’s busy protecting you from everything and everyone he perceives as a threat, he’s not really looking at what you want and need.”
“And you think I need Sam?”
“No. You don’t need any man. But I think that boy is good for you and you’re good for him.”
“He doesn’t seem to think so,” I muttered.
“Why was he here last night?”
“Because he got some really bad news about his brother—”
“And he came to you,” Mamma cut in.
Just like I used to go to Youngblood to feel closer to him when something in my life felt too hard to handle on my own.
“He’s so confusing,” I whispered.
“I guess you have to decide if he’s worth it.” Mamma twisted the ridiculously large stone Papa had gotten her back when he was still a pop star around her finger. “Every relationship has a few hills to climb. Just like every rose has its thorn.”
“What?” I looked at her sharply.
She frowned. “You’ve never heard that phrase?”
“No, I’ve heard it.”
Mamma had no way of knowing how roses and thorns were significant to my relationship with Sam. I’d never told her or anyone what he’d told me on the roof of Youngblood or how it had inspired the tattoo on my back.If you’re not willing to bleed for something, you have no business longing for it.
Was I willing to bleed for Samuel Torres? Did it matter what I was willing to do if he wasn’t willing to bleed for me?
My phone buzzed, flashing Shawn’s picture.
“I have to take this,” I said, climbing off Mamma’s lap and bringing the phone to my ear.
Seventeen
Piper
It feltweird to be walking into the lobby of Youngblood in distressed jeans, a loose tank top, and a pair of Vans. I usually dressed up a little more than this.
Jules gave me a questioning look from his place at the door into the club, but I didn’t get a chance to explain before the elevator doors to my left slid open and Shawn stepped out.
