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“I didn’t marry Andrei for his money.” I catch myself, worried I may have offended the single person most capable of helping me.
“I will ask you not to interrupt me again, dear.” The smile dips slightly but never dies. “Wealthy men have an appeal that other men lack. If the money did not attract you at first, then it’s the way he carried himself compared to other men. There is a palpable confidence in the way they know what they want and how they can get it. A determination that can’t be denied. A wealthy man has certain qualities that attract a certain type of woman.” She pauses, as if expecting me to interrupt. When I don’t, she leans back in satisfaction and continues. “Asmartwoman. There’s no shame in wanting to be taken care of. It’s only shameful if you don’t know how to take care of yourself.”
It’s like she knows what’s been in my head since before I met Andrei. “And what if I have to leave him? Not that I am,” I add quickly.
“Do you own a house in your name?” she asks, and I don’t dare mention Dad’s mess of a house. “No? Then you find a vacation house and tell him you want him to buy it for you. Then you spend more and more time there than you do at home. In time, he will understand.”
I glance around, wondering if that’s what she did, and when my gaze returns to hers, she smiles knowingly.
“Now, my dear.” She leans forward, laying one hand above the other. “Tell me the truth for why you are here. Hold nothing back. Your secrets are safe with me.”
***
The hour flies by quickly, and I thank Zhanna for her advice. I promise to visit again, but I hope I won’t have to. When Stefan asks if he can drive Emma home, Emma laughs and tells him he can.
The drive home is quick as I ruminate over the things Zhanna has said.
I can’t be this callous. I can’t ask for jewelry and a house. But I get it. In their world, there are ways of doing things. I shake my head at my middle-class morals. But I can’t do it so … heartlessly.
But I will call the fund manager when I get home. I take a long way home so I can be alone and think. I glance at the Rover in the rearview mirror, and my blood boils.
Well, almost alone …
Andrei is so focused on the Bratva and his loyalty to the business, much to my consternation. I can’t understand why he doesn’t see my perspective after what happened. I’ve always felt resentful and hurt by his single-minded focus on something that brings death and pain. And in a crazy way, I’m jealous of the hostile bond that ties Andrei and Talia.
It seems that nowadays, her name is on his lips more than mine.
I know he can’t give me the ordinary life I want. Money can’t buy us the safety or freedom in anonymity that I crave. I can see the pain and confusion in Andrei’s eyes whenever I pull back from him.
But I know that no matter what I say, he can’t love me the way I want.
I’m an asset, not a wife.
By the time I reach home, I feel justified in doing what I must.
Chapter 19
Paige
The phone is missing from its hiding place. I feel sick as I hold onto the bathroom sink and search in the cabinet again. It’s not under the towels, which means Andrei must’ve found it.
That also means he knows I’ve been talking to Kenney.
I don’t feel guilty. And it doesn’t change anything. Today, I have an appointment to meet with Kenney at the lawyer’s office. Neutral territory for what I hope will be an adult conversation aboutmymoney.
I will drive my Mercedes with Viktor in the car as my guard. Driving is the final bit of freedom I have left, but soon that will change as well.
I will make it change. I never picked this criminal life, and I don’t intend to make my sister or my baby suffer. But just in case, I decide to leave early and park across from the building so I can watch who’s coming and going.
“Are you ready to leave?” I ask Viktor as he stands around the main hall.
He nods. “I’m at your beck and call, Paige Geraldovna.”
I don’t like the tone in his voice. Viktor hasn’t spoken to Andrei, though I doubt it has little to do with me. I can barely look Viktor in the eye, but I need someone who will keep their mouth shut.
He’ll only tell if asked, so I have to make sure Andrei won’t ask him too many questions.
“How have things been going?” I ask him as we pull down the long drive.
