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“Are you seriously googling him right now?” I run a hand through my hair and sigh. “According to my dad, he does have a girlfriend. Not that it even matters. If I wanted to be with him, I’d have come back home years ago. I didn’t, Sam. I need you to trust me, okay?”
He inhales deeply before replying. “I do. I do trust you, Emilia. But I can’t help but worry, nonetheless. I’d be insecure if he wasn’t who he was. The worst thing is that I actually look up to the guy. The medical research his company is doing is phenomenal, and I hate that, you know? I hate everything about this.”
“I know,” I whisper. “I wish things were different too. I want nothing more than to be in London with you. I wish my dad was fine and none of this was happening. But it is, Sam.”
He groans. “Shit, I’m sorry, Emilia. I’m being ridiculous. Put your dad first, okay? I’m sorry. I wish you weren’t staying with Carter Clarke, but I’ll deal with it. I know you’re mine, and I know you’re loyal. Besides, I was able to get a few weeks off next month, thanks to the endless overtime I’ve worked, so I’ll come see you and your dad, all right?”
I bite down on my lip, a twinge of unease settling in the pit of my stomach. Sam and I agreed that he’d come visit as soon as possible, but that was before I realized I’d be staying with Carter. “You don’t have to spend your entire annual leave on a trip here,” I say carefully. “But I’d love to see you. I’d love to show you the town I grew up in.”
Sam chuckles. “I can’t wait to see it, and to meet the people you grew up with.”
I inhale deeply. Is there even a single place I could take him where I don’t have memories with Carter? I shake my head in an attempt to clear the memories. I can’t go down memory lane.
“I can’t wait,” I tell him.
“I can’t wait to see you,” he says. “I love you, Emilia.”
I stare up at my ceiling blankly, my heart filled with a dull ache. “I love you, too,” I murmur, but for the first time in a long time, I’m questioning my feelings. If I love him like I’ve convinced myself I do, why don’t I miss him? Why don’t I need him when things are so tough? Why don’t I crave his arms?
Chapter 11
Carter
I walk into the kitchen at six in the morning, only half surprised to find Emilia standing in front of the coffee machine, dressed in that prissy way she likes nowadays. A tight black skirt that hugs her ass beautifully, and a pink blouse that I’m sure will cup her breasts perfectly. I’m already anticipating her turning around so I can get a better view.
I lean back against the wall and watch her for just a couple of seconds. I barely even recognize her. She doesn’t smile the way she used to, and she no longer has that mischievous look in her eyes that I used to love about her. It’s like time has chipped away at everything that made her so her. I wonder if she even owns any jeans anymore. I know for a fact that she rarely leaves the house, yet she wears these stuffy clothes and those hot fucking heels every single day.
I push away from the wall and Emilia turns, surprised. Her eyes widen when they land on me and I bite back a smile when her gaze roams over my body, lingering on my abs. She bites down on her lips, and I swallow hard. Looks like she enjoys my fresh from the gym look.
“Morning,” I murmur, my voice gravely.
Emilia snaps out of it and looks up at me, her cheeks pink. “Good morning, Carter,” she says, and the tone she uses irritates me. Everything that comes out of her mouth sounds so fucking formal. I look at her with raised brows and walk towards her to grab myself a cup of coffee.
“Where are you going this early in the morning?” I ask her, my eyes running over her body. I fucking knew it. Her breasts look amazing in that blouse. Why the hell is she still this beautiful?
Emilia blinks up at me. “Oh, nowhere. I have no plans. I was thinking of having breakfast with my dad, and then I’ll have to see. I thought it might be nice to go into town.”
I frown and lean back against the counter as I take a sip of my coffee. “You have zero plans, yet you’re dressed like you’re going to work. What’s up with that?”
Emilia looks away, a flash of annoyance lighting up her eyes. “I can’t very well walk around in my pajamas.”
I bite down on my lip and her eyes follow my every move. “Hmm, I recall you lounging in my t-shirts all day, back when we lived together. If I recall correctly, you once tried to convince me that bras are torture devices concocted by misogynists.” My eyes drop to her breasts and I lick my lips. “Looks like you’ve had a change of heart, huh? Here you are, definitely wearing a bra, voluntarily. You certainly don’t need to on my account.”
When my eyes travel back up to hers, she’s staring at me wide-eyed. I grin at her and she blinks, her cheeks reddening. “I… that’s… what?”
I bite back a smile. “I said you don’t need to wear a bra on my account. If anything, I prefer you without the damn things on.”
Emilia looks shocked, and I can’t help but chuckle. That’s more like it. At least that damn prissy expression of hers has cracked. She glares at me and crosses her arms over each other, covering up her breasts.
“What would Layla think if she heard you say that? Do you have no respect for your girlfriend, Carter?”
I take another sip of my coffee and look at her leisurely. “Why should I care what she thinks? I’ve only ever had one girlfriend, and it was never her. It never will be, either, and she knows that,” I say. I see the surprise in Emilia’s eyes and I love it.
“So, like Dad said, you’re just shagging her?”
I burst out laughing. “Shagging?” I repeat. “That word sounds ridiculous coming out of those pretty lips of yours.”
Emilia looks away, the edges of her lips tipping up just slightly. I push away from the counter and walk up to her, pausing right in front of her. Emilia looks up at me and I place my finger underneath her chin, keeping her eyes on mine.
