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Kate squeals excitedly. “It looks so good though! I knew you’d get the hang of it quickly.”
Emilia nods and I roll my eyes. So it wasn’t for me then. She didn’t get dolled up for me. Why the hell do I keep getting my hopes up? I’m such a fucking loser.
Kate reaches for the remote control and I grab it to keep it out of her reach. “What the hell, Carter?” she shouts. She jumps up to grab it from me, but I hold on to it.
“What’s wrong with you? You know we always do marathon days on Wednesday.”
I shrug. “I don’t care. I’m watching TV. Go watch at Emilia’s house or something.”
The last thing I want is for Emilia to leave, but I know it’s probably better that she does. Part of me is hoping she’ll fight me, though. I want her to tell me I’m being a dick, to see that fire in her eyes as she demands that I hand over the remote. I glance over at her, but she’s sitting on the sofa demurely as though Kate and my antics have nothing to do with her. My mood plummets even further.
“How can you be so mean to me, Carter? I’m literally only asking for the TV on Wednesdays. You have it pretty much to yourself most other days. Just one day, damn it. Can’t you even give your sister that much?”
I roll my eyes. She’s always watching Netflix, not just on Wednesdays. I’m sick and tired of Kate’s shit. “I told you I don’t care. Go watch somewhere else. I’m watching the game.”
Kate crosses her arms and glares at me before throwing puppy eyes my way. Her expression goes back to rage when I don’t give in.
“Come on,” she says. “I’m not feeling that well. I think I might have a cold coming up. I just wanna lie down and chill for a bit.”
I glance at Emilia, who is finally smiling. Her eyes catch mine and she nods.
“Yeah, she’s totally got an upcoming cold,” she says, not at all convincingly. I stare Kate down and she purses her lips.
“I don’t see why you’d get priority access to the remote control just because you’re feeling ill, though. Just go to bed.”
Kate looks at me in disbelief and then looks at Emilia. “Milly, help me out here,” she pleads. Emilia hesitates and then rises to step closer to me. Her perfume washes over me and my heart instantly starts to race.
“Carter, please,” she says. “We always do marathon days on Wednesdays, and you know that.”
“I don’t care.” I shrug, looking her straight in the eye. Emilia looks startled, probably because I’ve always given in whenever she’s asked me something. Even Kate looks surprised.
She glances at Kate and smiles tightly. “Let’s just go to my house.” She turns to leave and I grab her hand to stop her. She looks back at me and I hand her the remote. I don’t want her to go. Even when I’m mad at her and I want to get a rise out of her, I still want her near.
“I can’t believe you two are being such cry babies about it,” I snap. Emilia’s lips turn up at the edges and she takes the remote from me. She looks up at me gratefully and it hits me right in the chest.
I’ll never be able to deny this girl anything. If our roles were reversed and she was the one asking me out, I’d never be able to say no. I’d do everything in my power to keep our relationship secret if that’s what it takes, but I’d never deny her. The fact that she can tells me enough about where I stand.
I need to get over Emilia. I need to nip my growing feelings in the bud. I need distance and I need space. I can’t be around her, at least not for a little while. I need to forget about her.
Chapter 36
Emilia
“Are you sure he’ll let us stay?” I ask, oddly nervous. Kate puts on another coat of lipstick and drags my already far too revealing dress down a little more, showcasing even more of my boobs.
“Carter is holding his graduation party at our house and begged Mom and Dad to go away for the weekend. Since Mom isn’t here, he’s stupid if he thinks he can keep us away,” she says.
I shake my head as she sticks her hand into my bra to adjust my boobs for maximum cleavage. I look in the mirror and smile to myself. She’s actually done a great job. We both look good. Kate looks stunning with her long brown hair and miniskirt. She’s managed to make me look so much hotter too, with the makeup and the push-up bra. I feel like a totally new person — I can’t even remember the last time I felt this confident. I wonder what Carter will think when he sees me. Things between us have been a little weird. He’s been ignoring me, and I’ve been trying my best to pretend that my heart isn’t breaking. There have been no pranks, no texts, no conversations, and definitely no kisses or longing looks. It’s like he got over me the moment he realized I didn’t want to be in a relationship with him. It hurts, but I can’t even fault him for it.
The party is already in full swing by the time we walk down the stairs. Kate’s eyes light up when she sees Asher, and he looks just as excited to see her. These two are going to get caught soon if they don’t hide their obvious attraction better. I’m worried about them and at the same time I want what they have. Kate told me about their first kiss a few weeks ago and how guilty she felt about it, but just like Carter and I, she and Asher can’t seem to stay away from each other. She tells me it’s just a fling and that they’ll break things off as soon as Asher leaves for college, but I know it’s more than that for her. I’m worried Carter will find out about them and kill them both. For a while I was sure he knew about them, but now I’m not so sure. Part of me also hates that Kate is doing the one thing she said she’d never tolerate. Why is it okay for her to get with Asher, even just for a few weeks, but I can’t do the same with Carter without risking my friendship with her and my relationship with Helen? It’s unfair and I hate it.
Kate looks up at me pleadingly and I sigh, trying my best to put my bitterness aside. Even if I can’t have what I want, I shouldn’t begrudge Kate her happiness. I smile at her and nod, earning me a grateful grin in return. It only takes her a couple of minutes to disappear and she’s being far from subtle. I’m worried she and Carter will both get hurt over this. Mostly Carter… I’m scared he’ll feel betrayed when he finds out about Asher. Part of me is also concerned that he’ll blame me for knowing and not telling him.
I inhale deeply and walk into the kitchen to pour myself a vodka with cranberry juice. I’ve only taken three sips when Carter comes storming into the kitchen. He looks hot as hell. He’s wearing a shirt that’s tight enough to showcase his muscles, and he’s got the sleeves rolled up to show off his forearms. I want to unbutton his shirt and reveal what he’s hiding underneath. Weeks have gone by since we slept together, and even though he’s been acting like I don’t exist, I still crave him with the same desperation.
Carter looks at me, his eyes glued to my chest. I guess my cleavage at least got him to look twice. He blinks a few times and then drags his eyes back up to mine.
“Oh, no you don’t,” he says, grabbing the cup from me. I glare at him and he glares back at me just as fiercely. “What the hell are you doing here, Minx? And what the actual fuck are you wearing? A t-shirt? Where are the rest of your goddamn clothes?”
