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She haunts me for the rest of the night.
* * *
If you’re about to leave, I think I’ll take you up on that offer on a ride home.
It’s lucky I saw that text from Alex when I did, because we were just about to head downstairs and out of the club. Dragging a thumb across my bottom lip, I look at Reed and grab his elbow lightly, stopping him in place. “Alex is here. Is it alright if she comes with us?”
Reed blinks once. “Your nanny?” he asks. I dip my chin in a nod, and he shrugs. “Yeah, sure. She’s going to the same place as you, anyway.”
We head downstairs, the club still bustling with life and energy as I send Alex a quick text back, telling her to meet us by the club’s entrance. She is already there by the time we get downstairs, cheeks flushed from either the alcohol or heat or both, her hair a little frizzy around her face—absolutely beautiful. The thought sucker punches me, but I breathe through it, which is difficult when she shoots us a brilliant smile.
“Thank you so much,” she rushes to say by way of greeting, looking from me to Willow and Reed. “I’m sorry for imposing—”
“You’re not,” Willow tells her immediately, her smile friendly and kind. “It’s not a problem, Alex.”
Her shoulders relax, her gaze touching mine briefly before it slides to the woman next to me. I see something flash across Alex’s eyes, gone within half a second—so quick, I wonder if it was just the lights flashing. But I swear, her smile dims and she looks like she is realizing something as she says to Jocelyn, “Hi, I’m Alex.”
Jocelyn smiles back. “Jocelyn,” she returns, not unkindly.
As expected, there are paparazzi outside of the club, their shouts immediately replacing the sound of music blaring inside the club. Reed and I had the thought to call some security just so we could get to the car safely, especially since we have women with us, and so guys the same size as us block us from overeager photographers. Used to the flashing lights, I don’t flinch as they continuously snap, but when I glance over, I see Alex keeping her head down, letting her hair curtain around her face as a way to keep herself from not being blinded. To my relief, she doesn’t look freaked out by the photographers—just mildly annoyed, which is understandable.
They follow us all the way to Reed’s car, and as Reed makes sure his wife gets in safely, I crowd around one of the back doors to let Jocelyn and then Alex in before I slide in after them. Reed and I thank the security guys before the doors shut and the tinted windows slide up, and my teeth press together when I feel the unmistakable press of Alex’s thigh against my own.
The three of us aren’t quite crammed in the backseat, but it’s snug enough that there is little to no space between Alex and me, with Jocelyn sitting on the other side of her. I swear, I can feel the heat of her skin against mine, through the denim of both of our jeans, taunting and electric. As Reed drives, the car is filled with Willow and Jocelyn chatting away, while music plays softly in the background, and I am doing my best to tear my attention away from where Alex and I are in contact—our thighs and arms.
It makes my blood hum, craving more than just this simple, mundane touch, even though I am well aware of all of the reasons I shouldn’t. What a fucking inappropriate cliché—to be so Goddamn attracted to my kid’s nanny. It would be laughable if it wasn’t so real and I wasn’t so torn up about it. If she was anyone else, I doubt I would keep my mouth shut and not try to pursue her in some way. But her job makes this a whole lot more complicated, in addition to the fact that she’s quite a bit younger than me. We would not be left unscathed, and the last thing I want to do is hurt Alex in some way.
I need to keep fucking remembering that, even as the heat of her body seeps into my own.
“So, Alex, were you at the club by yourself?” Willow asks curiously.
“No,” Alex says with a laugh. “I was there with a couple of friends, but I was feeling too tired to stay out for any longer. Were you guys there for long?”
Willow hums. “Not that long. The four of us were out to dinner at Vincenzo’s earlier.”
“Oh,” Alex says, and although her smile remains, I hear the subtle shift in her tone. I glance at her, tensing ever so slightly, but she doesn’t look at me. Instead, she’s still staring ahead, and I can see her smile is a little different. In her lap, she twists a ring on her finger. “Fun little double date, huh?”
Jocelyn lets out a small chuckle from the other side of Alex. “Something like that,” she muses.
My teeth press together, feeling Alex tense slightly next to me, and wonder how could she know that Jocelyn doesn’t mean anything by it? I’m positive that by the end of the night, we both mutually, silently, decided that this is as far as anything will go. There is no spark, no connection, nothing worth pursuing. But Alex doesn’t know that.
Whydo I want her to know that?
The car ride is uneventful, Willow and Jocelyn chatting away, and I can’t keep my attention from focusing on Alex. But she sits quietly, sometimes busying herself on her phone, her screen hidden away because of a privacy screen protector she has on it. Not that it’s any of my business, anyway.
We drop Jocelyn off first. “Thanks for the ride,” she smiles as she gets out of the car in front of her place. Her gaze touches mine, and her smile remains friendly. “I had fun.”
I respond with a polite smile of my own, and after she and Willow exchange goodbyes, Reed drives off once Jocelyn is inside her house and has shut the door behind her. Almost immediately, Alex shifts, putting distance between us and sliding to where Jocelyn had been sitting. I feel the loss of her immediately, my arm and thigh still warm from where hers had been pressed into them, and my jaw clenches as I warn myself not to do something stupid and inappropriate like reach for her and pull her back into me.
Even with the space between us, I can still sense the tension in her body, the way it has been since she learned of this supposed double date. My tongue presses to the back of my bottom teeth. Is she jealous? Admittedly, the thought is more than a little intriguing, making my blood pulse. I don’t let myself get too excited, telling myself that I am probably reading into things incorrectly, but I can’t fucking help it. The idea of Alex being jealous of someone who was more or less on a date with me sprouts a dangerous seed of hope that perhaps she wants me the way I want her, and not just when she’s drunk and letting her thoughts unknowingly spill out.
When Reed pulls the car up in front of my house, I clap him on the shoulder from where I’m sitting behind him. “Thanks for the ride, man.”
The corner of his mouth twitches into a smile. “No problem.”
Alex opens her door, smiling at both Reed and Willow. “Thank you so much.”
Once the goodbyes are said, Alex and I get out of the car and while they drive off, I say to her, “I’ll walk you to the guest house.”
