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Because one thing I’d learned in the last few years, was that people walked out that front door; but they rarely came back.
“I love you. Have a great time.” I whispered into her hair and looked up at the ceiling to ward off the tears.
“I love you, too.” She whispered, pulling back to smile, “I’ll call you all the time and send you pictures.”
“I can’t wait.” I said and stood at the screen door as she ran down the path and jumped in the car. I waved and waited until they were down the street and out of sight before I stepped back and shut the heavy oak door letting the ominous thud of it rattle my bones.
I turned the deadbolt and sank to my knees there on the worn-out hard wood floors and let all my pain out into the world. I screamed until my voice broke and faded, ruining my nails by digging them into the floor, then collapsed and sobbed until the daylight faded into darkness and came back again.
I was alone.
I had no one.
This was a heartbreak too strong to overcome.
Chapter 16 – Delilah
Present
Anoiseblaredinthe back of my skull, trying to pull me out of the slumber I finally found what felt like only minutes ago. I opened one eye and forced myself to look around my dark room and realized the noise was my alarm clock.
“Fuck.” I groaned. Work.
I reached over to grab my phone and hissed as my ribs burned. Then it all came flooding back into my brain.
Taz and his kick to my side.
“This ain’t overDelilah. I’ll be seeing you around and when I do, you better have that pussy good and wet for me. I’m taking my cut of it.”
His words echoed in my brain on repeat for a long time after I crawled into bed last night. During my shift I had been able to push it into the back of my head because I knew I was safe there with Bones and Lori looking out for me. But once I got home to my empty house, fear took place of my loneliness.
I looked outside at one point, and Fox sat against his bike on the ground, watching the house like a noble guard.
I wanted to give into the desire inside of me to call him inside and let him comfort me. I wanted to allow myself comfort for the first time in years.
But I didn’t.
Instead, I laid in the dark and battled the fear and loneliness in silence. Just like every other day of my life.
I rolled out of bed and held my arm around my waist for support and walked to the window, slowly pulling the curtain back to look out front.
And there he was.
Fox walked back and forth along the sidewalk next to his bike with his head down and his hands in jeans pockets. His hair was loose and swaying in the breeze as he paced. It was longer than it was when we were together; I ran my fingers up and down the smooth curtains and imagined they traced the strands of his hair like they used to instead.
Talk to him.
Let him in.
Find out the answers you need.
Tell him the truth.
Heal.
My conscious spoke through the silence to me, begging me to do the right thing.
However, I looked around my bedroom and saw all the signs of Penelope’s existence surrounding me. It was like that throughout my entire house, and I knew he’d notice the second he walked in the door. I couldn’t do that until I had time to talk to him.
