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“Of what?”
I shrug beneath the comforter as I search my muddy mind for an answer. “Everything. Being alone. I don’t know.”
Silence stretches on for a while, and I’m about to drift away again.
“What happens if I leave you here until early afternoon?” he finally asks, dragging me back from the brink of sleep. “Will you get up on your own and make sure to eat?”
Probably not.I just want to lie here and disappear into a heavy sleep. “Please just let me sleep.”
“This won’t work.” The hand disappears and Grigory gets up. “You’ll come with me to the opera, where I can take care of you.”
When my only response is a groan, the comforter flies off, accompanied by a not-so-patient, “Get up.”
“Just let me sleep,” I repeat.
“You can sleep in my office.” Grabbing my arm, he drags me up, and my entire body reels as my feet hit the floor. It’s like a cold bucket of water, yet my limbs refuse to wake. I blink my eyes rapidly, trying to force them open, but everything remains a blur, and I cling to Grigory as he wraps an arm around me and leads me to the bathroom.
He doesn’t release me until I’m safely seated on the open toilet, and I’m too far gone to care when he remains beside me as the trickle of pee sounds in the room.
My legs are only a bit steadier when he helps me back up—just enough for me to stand on my own as I wash my hands. I watch Grigory through the mirror as he opens the shower stall and turns on the water.
“Undress,” he says, coming up behind me.
I obey without thought, losing my camisole, shorts, and panties while Grigory keeps me steady with a hand around my arm.
Then he checks the water temperature and guides me into the glass stall. The hot spray feels heavenly on my nervous skin, and I close my eyes as I breathe a deep sigh.
When I open them back up, I find Grigory standing outside the stall, watching me with concern etched into his forehead.
“I can handle taking a shower,” I say.
“Are you sure?” He studies me like I can’t be trusted, and I probably can’t, because I’m not sure about anything right now.
“Yes,” I say anyway, and Grigory peruses me for a moment before conceding with a brusque nod and leaving the room.
After a long shower and brushing my teeth, I wrap a towel around my shoulders and return to the bedroom. A pair of fresh jeans and my warm, rosy sweater are laid out on the bed along with a T-shirt, panties, and socks.
A slight flicker of surprise flashes through my mind, but I’m too tired to linger on it.
I mindlessly put on the clothes before staggering through the apartment in a daze, finding Grigory reading the paper in the kitchen.
“Let’s go.” Folding his paper, he gets up and shoves an apple into my hand before steering me toward the hall.
Half an hour later, we’re in his office, and I’m barely more sentient than when I left the bed.
“Eat, then sleep,” Grigory says as he starts unpacking the food he got me on the way.
I plop into one of the recliners in front of his desk and watch with tired eyes as he sets out a plethora of breakfast foods before me. It’s way too much, but I know him well enough by now to know that this is his way of making sure I eat—his way of taking care of me.
“I have orchestra rehearsals for a few hours.” He goes to retrieve the blanket and pillow in the closet. “If you need anything, text me.” With that, he leaves, seemingly in a hurry.
It takes me five minutes of staring at the food before I finally dig in. The shivers in my body have ceased, but I still feel like resting my head on the desk is all it would take for me to fall asleep.
Not even eating a yogurt and half a bread roll restores my strength. So when I lie down on the couch under the blanket Grigory laid out for me, I fall asleep immediately and don’t wake until he returns three hours later.
***
Grigory shuts the lid on his laptop, and I lift my eyes to find him leaning back in his chair behind his huge desk, watching me with the same concerned frown he’s been giving me all day.
