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“It is,” I agreed.
“Even better when we have a win in our pocket though, right?” she asked.
“Definitely.” I wanted to say more, but my mind was whirling with all the things we weren’t saying or doing.
After a few moments of silence, Brynn gave me a soft smile. “Okay, then,” she said. “I’m going to head up.”
I swallowed hard. I’d booked the penthouse, not only because it was the best but because it had two rooms. When we traveled for away games, I usually booked Brynn her own room, but this time I’d wanted her even closer than usual. She didn’t seem to mind.
“You staying down here?” she asked when I didn’t immediately move to follow her toward the bank of elevators across the marbled lobby floor.
“Yeah,” I said, motioning to the bar behind me. “I’m going to grab a drink while answering some more emails.”
“Do you want me to stay with you?”
“No,” I answered a little too quickly. “You go up. I’ll be along later.”
Her shoulders dipped just a fraction, but she nodded and spun around, disappearing into an elevator moments later.
I blew out a breath, loosening my tie as I headed to the bar and ordered a tonic and lime. A good whiskey would do wonders for my nerves, but the last thing I needed was something else clouding my judgment right now.
I responded to email after email, none of it helping distract me at all. Every swipe on my phone was just an automatic motion my body performed when my mind was already upstairs with Brynn.
My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I slipped it out, answering it after reading the screen.
“Congrats on the win,” Ethan said once I answered.
“Thanks,” I said.
“You out celebrating?”
I glanced around the lonely bar and shook my head. “Had dinner with Gareth, Brynn, and some of the guys.”
Ethan laughed. “Did Gareth make you pay?”
“Course he did,” I said.
“It was a close game. Fun to watch.”
“Thanks,” I said.
“You all right?” he asked after a second’s pause. “I called for a quick congrats, thinking you’d be out celebrating, but you sound down. Need to talk that shit out?”
I huffed a laugh, messing with my tonic with my free hand. “Is it that obvious?”
“Only because I know your tones,” he explained. “What’s up? Lena digging into you about an engagement still? Thought you handled that?”
“I did,” I said. “It’s not that. It’s not her.”
“Ah,” he said, a little too much understanding in that simple response.
“What would you do if you had a chance at gaining everything you ever wanted, but the price was fucking steep if you failed?”
There. I asked the question, but it could be about a business deal. He didn’t know I was talking about Brynn.
“Anything in life worth something doesn’t come easy,” he said. “But if it’s what I really wanted? Like, end-all-be-all wanted? What wouldn’t I do to get it in the end?”
“Even if it could ruin everything if it went south?”
