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LIVY
Itake a leap, wrapping my legs around his waist, threading my hands into his too long hair, and seize his mouth.
It’s not ladylike. And I don’t care one bit.
I don’t do dirty talk but I need him, and he’s always telling me what he wants.
“I want you inside me. I want your cock to fill me so deep, I can feel you hit the end of me. I want to be stretched by you, pulled apart. You promised to ruin me, Layton. Ruin me.”
I reach between us only to have a vise wrap around my wrist. It’s too quick, too firm. Too much.
Cold rejection slithers through my veins. He softens the blow with a gentle voice. “Today was about you, baby.”
“I’m trying to make it about us.” My voice is quiet.
He looks away and pushes himself back a bit, using the momentum and the force of his arms to make for the stairs. He steps out, slowly and deliberately, and without a look back, walks to and through the doors to the bedroom, the limp obvious in his gait.
I don’t know what happened. One minute he’s hot; the next he’s cold. He wants to get me off, but not get off himself. He wants to touch me and kiss me and finger me, but not allow me to do the same.
My face flames. I’m embarrassed and so freaking sick of being not enough. Once and for all, I’m getting to the bottom of this.
I storm to the house and through the doors. The cold air is like ice on my skin, and the pools of water on the floor say it did the same to Layton mere minutes before.
The sound of water running draws me to the bathroom. I push open the double doors and look at an en suite bathroom the size of my living room. Layton peers around the open enclosure to the shower and closes his eyes, dropping his head.
“No, you don’t.” I march into the area that might as well be a small car wash. Jets hit me from every angle as rain falls from above me. I get right in his face, as much as I can from a foot shorter than this infuriating man and demand, “What is it? What is it about me? What about me isn’t enough?”
His head snaps back, and the look that passes over his face should tell me something.
But I’m not reading messages right now. I want words. I want to hear them trip from his lips as he lays it all out there. “Tell me.” I poke his chest.
I should notice that he’s in his shorts and tee shirt, but the fact doesn’t register.
He scrubs his hair, and a pained look crosses his features.
“Nothing?” I strip out of my bra and my athletic shorts and stand before him completely naked. “I’m here. I’m literally naked. And let’s be honest, figuratively too. I’m asking you to tell me what it is you find so lacking. I’m telling you that you’re hurting me. And I’m begging you to put me out of my misery.”
He looks to the ceiling, his chest heaving.
“Layton Ranger, this is me calling you on your shit… The way you told me to… when you told me not to let you fuck this up.”
“And this is me, Pix, telling you my dick doesn’t work, not even when I’m fucking desperate for it to, so I can make you feel good, so I can feel good, so I can forget my fucked-up life.”
He turns, giving me his back, and leans deeply into the marble wall.
I drop to my ass and can’t stop the tears. It’s not about me. It’s not about being desperate for his touch. It’s about a man who seems to have lost so much, losing more than anyone knows. Losing his mom, his body, his career, his independence, his income, and now his manhood in one fell swoop.
“I’m sorry, okay? I…”
My head whips up. “Don’t you dare apologize.”
He shakes his head like he can’t comprehend my meaning. “Huh?”
“Don’t you dare apologize to me for that. That’s biology, and I hate it for you, but I won’t accept you apologizing for something you can’t control. I owe you an apology. I…” I suck in a deep breath. “I’m sorry for what I accused you of. That was unfair. Will you accept my apology? Please?”
Layton stands over me, blocking the spray that pummels me, and extends a hand. He leans heavily onto the wall, seemingly bracing as he helps me to my feet.
“I haven’t told anyone. As in no one. Just you, Livy. I trust you. I do. I just never wanted you to know. What kind of man can’t satisfy the woman he wants so desperately? What kind of man…” His words trail off.
