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“It’s a thing,” she says firmly. “I can see it in your eyes.”
I sigh, rubbing my hands over my face as I sit on the velvet seating inside the bathroom. “He’s going to break me,” I admit, “but he won’t leave me be.”
She joins me, looking concerned. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I can’t admit he might actually be having an impact on me.”
Meli smiles. “This is so exciting.”
“No. No, it isn’t, Meli. I just want him to stop, but he won’t. He shows up where I am. He does things to me that I never let anyone do—”
“Like?” she asks, sitting up for the gossip.
“Like he bosses me around.”
She frowns. “That’s not exciting.”
“He doesn’t take my bullshit, Meli. He’ll call me out on it and then shut me up with an order or a kiss or something else that just stops me in my tracks and I . . .” I take a few breaths. My chest is tight and my vision blurs.
“Shit, are you having a panic attack?” Meli asks, taking my hands. She grabs a paper bag from beside the sink and gives it to me. “It’s a sanitary bag, but it’s clean.” I press it to my mouth and breathe in and out slowly like she instructs. “Just relax. This isn’t as scary as you think.” I roll my eyes. She has no idea. “Shit, and you brought Archer to this dinner as your date.” I nod. “He must have been raging,” she says with a laugh.
I feel a little calmer, so I remove the bag from my face. “Since Eagle, I haven’t felt anything for anyone. And what I felt for him wasn’t anything good, so I guess this is the first time since Maverick that I’ve liked someone.”
“You’ve not felt for anyone since you were a teenager?” she asks, and I shake my head. “Rosey, that’s so sad.”
“Pathetic,” I mutter.
“No, not at all. It’s your turn to find happiness. Grab it with both hands.”
“I have so much to deal with,” I protest.
“Bullshit. Make this happen, Rosey, or you’ll regret it forever.”
“But Ollie is so unsettled and—”
“It’s just excuses. Ollie is a teenage boy. He’ll survive without you breathing down his neck, trust me. Besides, Albert would make a good stepdad.” She laughs, and I smile.
“I just don’t think I’m ready to jump in, yah know?”
“You can’t avoid all relationships just in case they turn out to be arseholes who hurt you. Heartbreak is how we learn. Have some fun. See how it goes.”
“I know if this progresses, he’ll start asking questions about Eagle and what happened. I don’t want him to see me like that,” I admit.
“I get it,” she says simply. “You know, I felt the exact same with Arthur. But it wasn’t as bad as I’d made myself believe. Once I told him what happened to me, he didn’t look at me any different. Albert isn’t going to judge you on your past, a past you couldn’t help, and you can’t keep everyone at arm’s length just so you don’t have to talk about it.” She smiles. “I should have guessed. You were so quiet tonight, it’s not like you at all. Could he be the man to tame you?” she teases.
I roll my eyes. “I don’t think so. We should go back before Arthur sends out a search party.”
As the words leave my mouth, the door opens and Arthur steps in, grinning at Meli. “No, Art, not here,” she hisses.
“Yes, here,” he says, moving towards her.
She stands, backing away and glancing around helplessly. “Can’t you just wait until we get home?”
He guides her into a cubicle and slams the door. “I guess that’s my hint to go,” I mutter, leaving them to it.
I head outside in the hope I’ll flag a cab, but Albert is already out there. He holds up his car keys. “I thought you’d try and escape.”
“It’s early,” I say. “I can get a cab.”
