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She sits up in bed, propping a pillow behind her and pulling out her phone. We sit there in silence for a while. When I look at the time, it's almost two in the morning.
Evie’s head begins to fall forwards as she dozes before she catches herself and startles. She pushes herself until she’s fully sitting up.
“Why aren’t you sleeping?” I ask her. I know my presence bothers her, but to go two full nights without sleep is fairly intense.
She pulls the covers back to get out of bed and starts doing some stretches. “I don’t sleep with other people in the room,” she tells me.
That's interesting. She's never stayed the night with someone then.
Why does knowing that make me happy?
“Not ever?” I ask, just to confirm.
She glares back at me. Her eyes are red with shadows forming under them. “Never.”
“Shocker,” I say under my breath.
“Oh, fuck you, Alexi. You know nothing about me,” she says, putting her hands on her hips. “Nothing. You sit on your high horse all day thinking you're above everyone and everything when you’re secretly taking all these medications just to keep it together. You might have had women stay the night with you, but have you ever had someone who actually cares about you?” She's yelling now.
In an instant, I’m on my feet and in her face. Her attitude is going to get her fucking killed. “Don’t talk to me like you know me either, Princess. You’re the one who decided to go poking your nose where it didn’t belong. All you had to fucking do was listen and mind your own goddamned business!” I yell back.
We’re standing chest to chest when Lev comes walking in. “As much as I love waking up to the sound of you two fighting, this needs to stop,” he says in the doorway.
“Mind your own damn business!” I yell at him. His face scrunches up. I never yell. This girl is making me snap, I’m not sure if I’ll be able to survive it. Or if anyone will. I ball my fists and start counting, hoping like hell I can calm the fuck down.
“Evie, get dressed for a run,” Lev says before pulling me out of the room.
“You should go to bed,” he tells me. I rub my hand over my face. He’s right. I’m not just on edge because Evie found the one thing I try to keep from everyone, but I’m also fucking exhausted. I don’t fight him. I just nod and head to my room.
I’m out before my head hits the pillow.
Chapter 21
I’m so tired my bones are starting to ache. I’m running with Lev, hitting the three-mile point when I trip over my own two feet. I don’t have the energy to brace myself and I fall hard.
“Evie, are you okay?” Lev comes to my side while I roll over and attempt to dust myself off.
I don’t answer him. I just push myself up and begin jogging again.
The moment I saw Alexi’s face when he caught me, I knew I’d found something extremely private. As someone who has struggled, and is still struggling, with my own mental health, I get why he was so angry.
I chose not to fight him with the punishment, feeling like I actually deserved it this time. While I wanted to find something I could use against him, I can’t bring myself to judge his mental state. I could never be the person that used that as a weapon. We may all be criminals here, but we all have lines we won’t cross and this is one of mine.
I understood all of it. That is until he thought he could make me change in front of him and that pretty boy Bryce. He can try to take away my sense of privacy, but I won't willingly give him the satisfaction of stripping in front of him.
And now, going on forty-eight hours of no sleep, I’m starting to lose it. I started to hear voices last night, all the vile things those men used to say to me kept me on edge all night. And while snapping at Alexi felt good initially, it took an extensive amount of energy. This isn’t the first time I’ve been sleep deprived, though. Last time, the pain that came with it stifled the exhaustion. This time, all I can focus on is the utter exhaustion. I have no idea how I’ll survive four more days of this.
Running begins to make me nauseous when suddenly I change course, running straight into the woods before leaning over a tree and emptying my stomach of any remaining contents. I hardly ate lunch yesterday and opted to skip dinner when the nausea set in. As I stand here, heaving up nothing but stomach acid, I begin to regret not eating anything at all.
Lev comes up behind me. He pulls back the hairs that fall into my face and runs a soothing hand up and down my spine. The tension in my body starts to melt away with his touch.
“Have you slept at all?” he asks when the vomiting subsides.
I just shake my head.
“You need to rest, your body’s starting to shut down.”
I don’t look at him though. Alexi has made it his mission to make me feel uncomfortable everywhere I go. I can’t sleep with him in my room. Can’t sleep with anyone in my room.
