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“They already know where we are, anyway. Anyone who leaves the compound has to be approved by one of the covens. Leading the Council to any of our contacts would be a disaster.” He sighed, and I wanted to sigh with him. It wasn't really his fault that he was the one having to make all the hard decisions, but I couldn’t see beyond the look on his face when he’d ordered Zuzanna to handle our captives.
Are you okay?Sariel’s voice down our bond startled me, and I gave him a tentative smile.
Peachy. This whole situation just sucks.
His hand found mine on the table, lacing our fingers together. It earned him a squeeze as everyone got ready to leave the meeting room.
It won't be like this forever,he reminded me, gently leading me from the room by my hand.
I tried to let myself relax as we wandered out into the evening air, but it was impossible. Not without a solid cry for everyone who was just as stuck in this shitty situation as I was—and the people who’d felt so trapped in it that death was a better alternative.
It’s all too heavy. I could barely stand under the weight of it.
It’s okay to be sad for them, but don’t let their loss drag you down with them.
That… wasn’t Sariel.
My mate looked equally surprised by the development, then annoyed, although the voice of his angel was silent after that. While it was unnerving that his angel could actually talk to me directly now, neither of us addressed the elephant in the room as he pressed a kiss to my knuckles.
“I think we could both use a full shift,” I admitted dryly, and he smirked.
“It would probably save us some trouble. I can feel your wolf pacing like a caged animal.”
I hadn't even tried to feel his angel, and that made me feel a little guilty, considering he’d taken the time to reach out and comfort me. “Do you feel her… a lot?”
I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to know, honestly. It was a weird conversation to have walking the silent, moonlit streets of the compound.
“More now than I did before,” Sariel admitted. “She seems tense lately.”
Thatwas a severe understatement. With everything going on, she was basically climbing the walls of my brain and leaving claw marks behind.
“This is all just… a lot. I knew we would have to fight, and people would die, butknowingit and seeing it happen are two totally different things.”
He nodded, dropping my hand to loop an arm around my shoulders, and I leaned heavily into him.
This was not our forever, just our present. One day, we wouldn't be surrounded by death, and war, andinsane fae bargains—we just had to get there. Hopefully, it wasn't that far off, and we would get to disappear into the sunset, leaving all the political cleanup to someone else. Auren would probably love that job.
Sariel kissed the top of my head, and I let out a long breath.
We just had to get there.
11
THE SAME LOINS
SARIEL
“You’re being petty.”
Aria said that so bluntly that it was borderline upsetting. Her eyes were narrowed, and her arms folded as I got dressed.
“I usually am,” I agreed—because it seemed like the right thing to do, even though our bond felt almost too hot in our chest—and she huffed.
“Sariel, he’s your brother. You have got to move past this.”
This was something I already knew. Something I’d already done, even.
It was a little easier to set aside everything that had pissed me off about my brother’s fake demise after I had stopped and really processed that he’d been a kid in a messed-up situation with no clear way out of it. Should he have told me? Yes. Could I hold it against him that he hadn’t? Absolutely not. No more than I would hold little Michaelson accountable for letting our dad lead him around by the nose for years.
