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“I guess.”
“What’s weighing on your mind, kid?”
“I just want to know what he’s thinking. I want to lay everything out on the table. I want to know what his intentions are, and not in general terms.”
“Think you might have to ease into all that, Charlotte, and slow down. Remember, this is a shock to his system. The man just found out he has a three-year-old son.”
“Thanks.” The reminder is something I don’t want or need. I feel bad enough as it is.
Lawrence chuckles. “Didn’t mean that the way you’re taking it.”
“I know.”
“What has he told you about his life?”
“I’ve been babbling nonstop, haven’t given him much of an opening.”
“There’s time for that.”
“Is there?” I look to Lawrence. “I think that’s what’s bothering me. Is he here for another day, a week? Will we see him again before the summer’s over, or is he going back to his life? Is he going to be a Christmas and birthday kind of father?”
“He doesn’t strike me as that type, but who really knows? What’s the worst-case scenario?”
“Hmm, I don’t know...Maybe that he leaves here tomorrow, goes back into the waiting arms of his beautiful girlfriend, gets married and sues me for full custody?”
“Is your mind really going there?”
“Not really.” I take a sip of my drink, considering the situation. “If I’m being honest, it’s just the waiting arms of the beautiful girlfriend thing.”
“Is this girlfriend real or imaginary?”
“Pretty sure she’s a reality.”
“Don’t borrow trouble from tomorrow.”
I nudge his foot with mine. “You’re sounding an awful lot like Janelle right now, and I mean that as a compliment.”
“No, Janelle would tell you not to put the cart before the horse.”
“Or not to count my chickens before they hatch.”
Lawrence studies me. “She would tell you that you can handle anything that comes your way. You’ve proven it a million times over. Best case scenario, worst case, doesn’t matter...You and Ethan are going to be fine.”
I mull that over, and knowing it’s true gives me some much-needed peace. I smile when Barbara Ryan’s battle cry comes to mind:You’ll do more than survive, you’ll thrive!
Yes, I need to be patient, but more importantly, I need to be realistic. Looking back over to where my son and his father rest together, I tell myself that I can handle anything that comes my way—I have to for Ethan’s sake. I can even survive the loss of Simon again.
“Can you take a picture for me?” Simon asks, handing me his phone. “Ethan, let’s get Moe in the picture with us.”
Ethan runs over and takes Moe by the collar. “Come on, boy.”
“That poor dog,” I mutter under my breath. “Gentle with him, Ethan.”
I look up to see Simon smiling at me. He’s been doing that all day, looking at me and smiling whenever I catch him.Don’t, Charlotte, I remind myself. Don’t go hanging your hopes on a fantasy. Remember that other girl. Yeah, she makes him smile too.
Collecting myself, I snap a few pictures. They look like good ones, but I’m careful not to scroll back and check. I don’t know if I’d be able to resist temptation, to get a look at the last photo he took. Would it be of her, of the two of them together?
“See if they’re good.” My tone sounds stiff when I hand the phone back to Simon.
