AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“So where do we go from here?”
She’s asking the million dollar question. “I don’t really know. Do you still feel comfortable working here? If you don’t, I’d totally understand.”
Her voice trembles when she asks, “Do younotwant me to work with Olivia anymore?”
“Sky, you know I think you’re great with Olivia.” I hesitate for a second before adding, “You’re the best thing that’s happened to our family in a long time. I hope you know that.”
She takes in a shaky breath. I can picture what she looks like right now. I can see her twisting her hair like she does when she’s uncertain, can see her sad eyes, and I’m so angry with myself because I’ve done this to her. I’ve hurt her.
“I’d like to keep my job if it’s ok with you.”
“Of course it is. And you and me…Can we go back to where we were? I swear I’ll never cross that line again.”
I feel sick having to say it again. To assure this girl that I won’t put my hands on her.
“Yeah, Leo. We can go back to where we were.”
“Maybe this trip to Florida is coming at a good time.”
“Yeah.”
I try my best to sound more upbeat, you know, more like everything is suddenly just fine and back to normal. “You’re coming over on Tuesday after your test, right? I mean, if you want to just get on the road that’s fine. I don’t need childcare that day, really. It’s just that Olivia’s got some big surprise for you. She’s taking the special person thing to another level.” I keep rambling. “I think she’s going to petition for it to be recognized as a national holiday or something.”
“A surprise?”
“Yeah.” I feel like I need to prepare her. “She made you a card and I think she wants to make you a cake…Like a quasi Mother’s Day thing. Is that all right?”
A moment passes before she says, “Sure. Ok, so I’ll see you Tuesday.”
“Thanks.”
I’m about to tell her that I’m sorry again, but stop myself. I still wish I could go back in time and undo what happened last night, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to scare her off if I keep groveling and apologizing.
And fuck me, I can’t stop thinking about it. Can’t stop replaying the things she said to me.You know every curve of my body.
I feel like a sick man when I think back to that night last year, touching her without even knowing her name.Do you still think about how good it felt?I picture myself with my hand on a bible, under oath, having no choice but to answer that I do. Yeah, I think about it all the time when I’mall alone in that big bed. Fuck, that stung.
And then I have to fully acknowledge that Iama bastard because the memory of our bodies pressed together along with the memory of her hand stroking me last night has me growing hard again.
I call out to Olivia that I’m taking a quick shower, all the while knowing that I’m going to let myself live in that moment again, telling myself:Just one last time.
As steam fills the room and the hot water pours down on me, I settle in and let my mind wander. I imagine Skylar’s face and the way she looked when I moved in close, the low moan that escaped when I touched her, her eager lips looking for mine to kiss hers.
In the shower I don’t push her hand away when she touches me. No, I cover her small hand with mine and show her how to make me feel good. I kiss her, let myself taste what I’ve wanted for so long. And when she gets down on her knees in front of me, I watch as she wraps her lips around me and takes me inside. Then I can’t see anything, can’t feel anything but the firm grip I have on myself as I pump my hips pretending that it’s her mouth I’m moving in and out of.
It doesn’t take long, and fuck it, this time I won’t let myself feel bad about it. I give myself permission to lose myself in it, to acknowledge that it feels so much better than good because this is the last time. I won’t let myself do it again.
Go back to where we were.
Yeah, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Skylar
Go back to where we were. Where exactly is this fantasyland?
I’ll never be able to go back to thinking of Leo as my employer, as Olivia’s father and nothing more. And while I know I’ll just have to suck it up and pretend, the foolish woman who lives inside of me doesn’t want to.
