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He doesn’t say a word, doesn’t take it back, doesn’t reach out to me.
But what he does look, is hurt.
Like I hurt him.
I’m not sure how. He betrayed me and hurt me with lies and with deciding what was best for me.
“Sidney?”
Gran’s voice is a lifeline, and I blink back the burning blur of tears in my eyes and turn, hurrying away from the unmoving Mack to Gran.
“Let’s go for a walk, kid,” she says, tucking her arm through mine.
We walk for a while without saying anything.
Smoke is in the air. Not heavy, just there at the edges to remind me there was a fire and that when Mack didn’t come back, when his brother turned up and took me with him to his mom and wife, I don’t think I’d ever been so scared before in my life.
The thought of him no longer here . . . I . . .
“This is a nice town,” Vic says.
“Mmm.”
“A nice place to set up.”
“Maybe,” I say. “But not for me.”
“Why not? Because you had some kind of tiff with your hot man?” Gran snorts.
“No. Because Dad’s new job is CEO of a company called Alpine Energy, who keep trying to buy up a piece of land here, and—”
“What are you afraid of, Sid? That you won’t get away from your parents? Because I have to say, you aren’t them, and the only power they’ve ever had over you is learned. Maybe I should have done more, but I wanted you to figure that out. And you did. You left, not running, Sid, but to have your life.”
“Or maybe it was running.”
She snorts again.
Then she studies me. “So, are you afraid of them? Or him?”
I swallow because I don’t know.
Mack and how he makes me feel scares me right down to the core of me.
“Through the flames, life will thrive, or it will die,” I say. “I’m trying, Gran. To thrive.”
“Oh, honey.” Vic stops and takes my face in both hands. “You need to truly understand the motto, because I think you’re missing the point.”
I swallow hard. “Which is?”
She pats my cheek. “That’s for you to work out. Come on, let’s get back.”
“We just started.”
Gran says, “It’s been long enough.”
Truth is, I don’t know if I’m ready to see Mack yet.
But Vic gets what she wants, and I’m half trying to figure out what she means if the motto isn’t about finding strength after a battle or going through your own trials.
