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With a deep breath, I turned around and walked away, trying not to roll my eyes as I made my way back to my room. In the distance, the mountains faded away, leaving me with a feeling of sadness I couldn’t explain. I was missing something I never even had.
Thankfully, my keycard still worked with no problems. I managed to get into my room and let out a sigh of relief, glad to see my own belongings scattered around the room. It would be nice to change into a different pair of my own clothes and use my own products.
Throwing myself onto the bed, I tried to stay focused on the fact that this was how things were meant to be. I was back to reality now, back to my real life. Still, lying down like this made it easier to remember what it had been like to have Beau on top of me, to feel his fingers on my skin, to take a breath and breathe him in.
My phone rang, jarring me slightly. Initially, I hoped that it was Beau, but that was a ridiculous thought so I pushed it aside. Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I saw that it was Lucy. A smile fell into place. It would be good to speak to my bestie and get all of this out of my system so I could move on from it.
“Hey,” I said, answering the call. “How are you?”
“How am I? How are you? Girl, I haven’t heard from you in two days. I wanted to call, but I didn’t want to interrupt you if you’d found your sugar daddy. I guess you are alive then?” Lucy blurted out, her voice full of excitement, and maybe a little irritation.
I’d called her briefly while I was at Beau’s to let her know that I’d gotten left behind and that I was staying with a nice local gentleman who had offered to give me a guest room to sleep in, but I hadn’t said much more for the same reasons I was hesitant to say them now.
“Yes, I’m alive,” I told her. “I’m sorry. I should’ve called you. It’s just, Beau and I were having a good time, and I didn’t have a chance.”
“Oooh, that sounds spicy. Tell me everything,” she said with a snicker.
“There’s not all that much to tell,” I lied. I didn’t want her to make a big deal out of this because it would be a bit of a joke to her. Lucy would want to tease me rather than actually understand how much Beau had meant to me even for the short amount of time the two of us were together. “We went fishing, went to dinner, went to a bar, and then went back to his house. This morning, he made me breakfast, and then he drove me to the port in Juneau. That’s all there is to say.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Lucy began. “Rewind there, sister.” She made a noise with her mouth that I thought was probably supposed to be the sound of a tape rewinding. “I think you skipped right over the very best part of all. You spent the night at his house, right?”
“Well, yeah. You already knew that.” I’d told her that much before. “So what is it you think I’m skipping?” I felt my cheeks turn red and was glad she couldn’t actually see me or else she’d know for certain I was hiding something.
“You’ve got to be shitting me,” she exclaimed. “You had sex, didn’t you? Didn’t you?”
My mouth fell open, but no words came out. She never hesitated to say exactly what she was thinking. Sometimes that came in handy, like when we were at a restaurant and someone sitting next to us decided to be a Karen to a waitress. Lucy would hop right in there and bite right back, but now, I hated that she could just read me like I was a basic reader. Did I have Dick and Jane tattooed on my forehead?
“You’d better fess up, girl,” Lucy demanded. “I need to know that you finally got some. What’s it been? Six months?”
“I don’t know, Luce. I don’t mark it on my calendar, and I sure hope that you’re not doing that for me either. Anyway, I survived an almost-bear attack, caught a big fish, and didn’t end up a lampshade in a serial killer’s apartment, so I think I’m good.”
“And you just did it again!” She groaned in frustration. “The fact that you are not denying it just makes me think that you did have sex with that guy.”
“Why is it any of your business?” I countered. “Do you have to know everything that I do?”
“Well, I don’t need to know if you ate some bad oysters and got the runs, but I’m your best friend. If you banged that guy, I should know!”
She had a point. It wasn’t like she didn’t already know that we’d had sex. “Fine,” I told her. “Yes, we had sex last night. One time. That’s it.”
Lucy squealed so loudly in my ear that I had to pull the phone away. “I knew it! I knew that you needed to go on this cruise and get yours!”
“This had nothing to do with the cruise,” I countered. “In fact, it was because the cruise failed that I was able to do this.”
“Bullshit! You wouldn’t have ever met this guy if you hadn’t been on the cruise. You owe me big time,” Lucy said with sass in her voice.
I couldn’t argue with that, I supposed. But I didn’t feel like I owed her. She didn’t quite understand, and I didn’t feel like I wanted to take the time to explain it to her. “All right, Lucy. Thank you for helping me finally have sex with a random stranger. Is that what you wanted to hear?”
“He isn’t a random stranger, is he?”
“Well, no not exactly. But it doesn’t matter. He’s in Alaska, and I’m on my way back to Seattle. I’ll see you in a day or two.” I yawned for effect. “I’m gonna get some rest.”
“Okay.” I could hear her struggling with what to say next. “Um, see you soon. Be careful. Don’t get lost again.”
“I won’t,” I promised her. We said goodbye, and I hung up, slipping my phone into my pocket and taking a deep breath.
Some random stranger. That wasn’t true at all. Beau was so much more than just a guy I’d had sex with, and I knew that, deep down in my soul, he was gone now and I’d probably never see him again. But I wanted to.
Intelligent, thoughtful, kind, successful, and hot as hell, Beau was the whole package. What were the chances I would run into a man like that? Probably one in a million.
