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I looked up like I didn’t know him. “Yes?”
“Can you please come in here?”
“Did you need something?” I asked.
“Yes,” he said. “Please.”
He disappeared into the office. As much as I wanted to tell him to fuck off, I couldn’t. He was my boss. I was not going to give him a reason to fire me. I grabbed the tablet and walked into his office. I tried to stand near the door, but he wasn’t having it. He closed the door behind me. I stepped away from him when he tried to touch me.
“What do you need?” I asked.
“Macy, please. Sit down.”
I blew out a breath and sat down. “What do you need?” I asked. “I haven’t had time to update your calendar.”
He sat down on the edge of the desk and crossed his ankles. “I know you saw the paper.”
“Yes, I did.”
“Will you please look at me?” he asked softly.
I looked at him with loathing and said nothing.
“It’s not what it looks like,” he said.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I replied.
“Yes, you do,” he said. “I didn’t kiss that woman. She rushed at me in the lobby. She acted like she knew me. I meet a lot of people and thought maybe I knew her. I stopped and said hello. She walked right up to me and tried to kiss me. I turned my head before her lips touched mine. She kissed my cheek. I know the angle of the photo makes it look like I was kissing her, but I wasn’t. I’ll get the guy that took the picture to tell you what really happened. He didn’t print the full story. I pushed the woman away and left. There was nothing to it.”
I shrugged. “Whatever.”
“No, notwhatever,” he said and leaned forward. “Look at me.”
He put his hands on the armrests and was within inches of my face. I looked him in the eyes. “I’m looking at you.”
“I didn’t kiss her. I’m not seeing her or anyone else. You have to believe me.”
“Anything else?” I asked defiantly.
He closed his eyes. “No,” he said and stepped away.
I got up and walked out of his office without saying a word. I went to my desk and went through my usual morning routine. I sent the updated calendar to his tablet and forwarded emails to him. I had to sit in on several of his meetings to take notes. I sat as far from him as possible while remaining in the same room.
“Macy, please talk to me,” he whispered while I sat at my desk.
I didn’t look up. I continued to type up the notes from the last meeting. I could feel his frustration. He was furious. The man was so used to getting his way. This was working out so much better than I’d expected. I ignored him. He finally walked away.
At exactly five o’clock, I packed up my things and walked out of the office without saying a word to him. Part of me was tempted to accept his apology and give in to his request to talk to him. I loved him. My idea to stick it out and keep working may not have been the smartest thing to do. It hurt to be close to him and not be able to have him.
My brother warned me loving him would kick my ass. He was so right. Loving him hurt. Not loving him hurt. It felt like I was punishing myself more than him. He was just going to go out and pick up another woman. I was the one that was going home alone to a pint of ice cream and a bottle of wine.
I stripped out of the tight skirt and heels. I helped myself to the wine and ice cream and sat at the kitchen table with my phone in hand. I scrolled through the pictures on my phone. The last twenty or so were of him. I stopped and focused on the picture of the two of us at the waterfall. It was a cheesy selfie. I hated selfies usually, but I wanted to have a picture of the waterfall and us together.
Trisha came in just as I was stuffing another bite of chocolate chunk into my mouth. Tears were streaming down my face.
“Oh no,” she said. “What happened?”
I wiped my tears. “I don’t know.”
