AllFreeNovel
Share Us
‘Number three, a woman who weighs more than you do.’
‘OK, this is just offensive,’ said Rob.
‘Like you didn’t spend your teenage years wanking off to Serena Williams like the rest of us,’ snarked Olly, prompting a reluctant snort of laughter from Nick.
‘Next up,’ Olly continued, ‘a woman who’s still wearing tennis gear when you pull her.’
‘This one’s deceptively difficult,’ said Chris, wafting his cigarette. ‘Means a daytime pull, which is much harder.’
‘Number five,’ said Olly, holding up his hand with his fingers splayed. ‘A married woman.’
‘What if she’s separated?’ asked Aaron. Rob shook his head and sipped his beer, wondering why the little keener wasn’t taking notes.
‘Doesn’t count,’ said Olly. ‘She has to be wearing the ring when her hand is down your pants.’
‘What’s the last one?’ Nick asked. Rob couldn’t tell if he was genuinely up for this stupid game, or just pretending to play along to avoid singling himself out. Probably not a bad strategy, to be fair.
‘The ultimate challenge,’ said Olly, his eyes twinkling. ‘A guest at the hotel.’ Chris chuckled gleefully, while Jonno rolled his eyes.
‘Woah,’ said Aaron. ‘I thought that would get us fired?’
‘That, my friend, is the challenge,’ said Olly, one eyebrow raised. ‘You have to do it, have witnesses, but not get caught by Mark.’
‘Ah fuck, man,’ said Nick, shaking his head.
‘Guys, I’m not interested,’ Rob said, wafting Olly away dismissively.
Olly observed him coolly. ‘Girls not your thing? That’s not a problem, you can do the guy version.’
‘We had a gay guy here last year,’ said Chris. ‘He totally smashed it, took all our cash. We swapped fake tits for fake tan.’
‘No, I’m not gay,’ Rob said, trying to laugh this whole thing off. ‘I’m just not cool with treating women like boxes on a checklist. Not my thing, sorry.’
‘Gentlemen, we have ourselves a feminist,’ said Olly, sweeping his arm in Rob’s direction.
‘Fine, if you like.’ Rob shrugged. ‘You guys do what you want, but I’m out.’
Olly shook his head. ‘Thank you so much for your permission to enjoy ourselves, Reverend Rob. Who’s in?’ Chris and Aaron raised their hands immediately, followed more reluctantly by Jonno. Nick glanced apologetically at Rob, then raised his hand. Rob shook his head and looked away, wondering if he hadn’t just made life difficult for himself.Oh well, too late now.
‘Who wants another beer?’ asked Chris.
‘Me,’ said Olly, standing up and stretching lavishly, revealing a washboard stomach and Armani boxer shorts. ‘One more round,garçon, and let another season of tennis, totty and top banter begin.’
Oh God, thought Rob. What have I done?
CHAPTER SIX
‘Are you OK?’ asked Sam, the only other person manning the front desk. Upton was an exclusive members-only country club about six miles from Guildford, complete with golf course, spa, stables and restaurant. It also had four beautiful tennis courts set in acres of Surrey countryside, but Hannah was only allowed to play on them by invitation, which only ever happened when Upton Ladies needed a secret weapon. Her official job title was Office Manager, but that covered a multitude of sins from managing IT and recruitment to ordering toilet rolls and working on reception.
‘I’m absolutely fine,’ she lied, forcing a smile. In truth, she was waiting for Janice, Upton’s General Manager, to arrive so she could tackle her over the minor matter of her sabbatical. Until that was done, she couldn’t say yes to the tennis trip.
‘I love Sunday afternoons when it’s pissing with rain,’ said Sam. The golf course and tennis courts were empty because of the weather, and the spa closed at 2 p.m. on a Sunday so they could scrub down the sauna and filter all the fake tan out of the jacuzzi. All of which meant that the only members in the building were in the gym or lingering over Sunday lunch in the restaurant. A perfect opportunity to make a head start on summer staffing admin, not that this would be Sam’s idea of a good time.
‘Have you ever considered coral lipstick?’ he asked casually, examining Hannah’s face with a critical eye. ‘It would look amazing with your skin tone.’ Sam had previously worked in the MAC store in Guildford before deciding to take his customer service career in a different direction. Despite his lack of experience, jet-black hair shaved into an undercut and multiple piercings, Hannah had taken a chance on him. Mostly because he gave off good energy, but also because he looked nothing like the kind of person you’d expect to be manning the front desk of an exclusive country club. He’d turned out to be the best hire she’d ever made.
‘I’ve never really considered any shade of lipstick,’ she said, shuffling through a pile of membership applications. ‘I just use lip balm.’
‘Such a waste on a face like yours,’ said Sam. Usually Hannah would brush off this kind of compliment, but she forced herself to engage. If she was going to get her act together for the next stage of her life, someone like Sam might be able to help her.
