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Hannah shrugged, unable to help returning his smile. ‘I have no idea. It was a moment of madness. I was probably still drunk from the night before.’
‘Sounds about right,’ laughed Rob. They were both quiet for a moment, Hannah pushing various options around in her mind and coming up with nothing that wasn’t riddled with loopholes.
‘Wait, I’ve got an idea,’ said Rob, waving his arms for added drama. ‘If your dad has never met Graham, I couldpretendto be him.’
Hannah rolled her eyes at him. ‘You of all people could probably pull that off. And actually, I don’t think Dad’s ever seen a photo of him.’
‘Ah, of course. No photos in your family. Which means I could definitely be Graham.’
She let out a bark of laughter. ‘You definitely couldn’t.’
Rob gasped and pressed his hand to his chest, pretending to be offended. ‘Why not?’
She looked at Rob, all tanned and gorgeous and outdoorsy, and imagined Graham standing next to him, probably eyeing everything suspiciously and mumbling about pollen. ‘Because the two of you arecompletelydifferent. My dad would be on your case in minutes.’
‘OK, but let’s just say Icouldpull it off,’ said Rob, holding open a gate so Hannah could pass through. ‘What would I be like?’
Hannah shook her head, deciding to play along because Rob was so clearly enjoying himself. ‘Hypothetically, right?’
‘Of course,’ said Rob. ‘I’m just trying to work out why you married him, because to be honest he sounds kind of lame.’
Hannah thought about it for a moment. ‘He wasn’t lame, he was safe. And at the time, safe was what I needed.’
‘And what about now?’
Hannah shrugged. ‘I grew up, found my own strength. Graham, not so much.’
‘Did you ever love him?’
Hannah stopped walking and gave him an intense look. ‘Sorry,’ he said awkwardly, burying his hands in his pockets. ‘You don’t have to answer that.’
‘No,’ said Hannah. ‘It’s fine. I just don’t think anyone has ever asked me that before.’
‘It’s quite a personal question, to be fair.’
‘Hmm,’ she said thoughtfully. ‘Looking back, I don’t think love was involved on either side. We had nothing in common, other than wanting to escape from our families and never go to church again. So we did each other a favour, then stayed together because neither of us had any other option.’
Rob nodded. ‘At least you didn’t have kids, so that’s something.’
Hannah was quiet for a moment, wondering how this fun conversation had suddenly strayed into such tricky territory. ‘I can’t have kids. We did try, but it turned out that’s not an option for me.’
Rob blew out his cheeks. ‘Shit. I’m really sorry, Hannah. I shouldn’t have said that.’
‘I’m OK about it, actually,’ she said. ‘I only realised recently that I don’t have any real desire to have children. I just wanted something at the time that belonged to me. Something that wasn’t Graham.’
‘I don’t want kids either,’ Rob said cheerfully. ‘Never have.’
‘How come?’
Rob shrugged. ‘I was the black sheep of a perfect family. There’s no way I could ever give my kids what my mum and dad gave me, so I’d rather just have an amazing life and be a really cool uncle.’
‘I’m going to call you in ten years,’ Hannah said. ‘I bet you’ve got a beautiful wife and two cute kids.’ She forced herself to play along, but inside her stomach felt like ice. Where would she be in ten years? Would she and Rob even remember each other?
‘You’re wrong, and I’d put a bet on it,’ he said. ‘But sadly I don’t have money to gamble.’
Hannah pulled a face at him, trying to get the conversation back on track. ‘So going back to your original question, if you did pretend to be Graham, you’d be a solicitor from Guildford.’
‘OK, that’s a very bad start.’
