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“Ginny, are you all right?” His voice shook me out of the past and I opened the back hatch so he could toss his bag in.
The drive to my house was quiet. I didn’t know what to say. I had known this man for over twenty years and here I was with him again and I had nothing to say to him. Pulling into my driveway, I got out of the SUV. Boone grabbed his bag and followed me in. “I guess I need to get you some keys.” I said as I rooted through the jar on the counter.
He moved up beside me and leaned on the counter, crossing his arms over his chest. It always made him look bigger and irresistible. “I still have my keys. Don’t worry about finding any.” Setting the jar down, I placed my hands on the counter. “Do you have to work tomorrow?” He asked quietly, leaning against the wall that separated the kitchen and the living room.
“No, I have Wednesdays off. I usually end up going in and catching up on paperwork.” Reaching for the wine fridge, I pulled out a bottle and popped the cork. “We’re going to need this, I think.” It was late in the day, and while I wasn’t a big drinker, the wine was calling my name.
Silence filled the house and I couldn’t believe he was here. It was awkward having someone in the house after all these years. Boone was on and off the phone most of the evening. I imagined it was mostly with different members of the team and the front office. He paced the living room, kitchen, and hallway. I went upstairs and closed the door to my room hoping to get some work done, but sitting on the bed I stared at the login screen on my laptop. Work was the last thing I wanted to do. I needed to leave the house. He was too close. I was too anxious.
Changing into my workout clothes, I walked to the front door and opened it. “Where are you going?” Boone asked, making me jump. Turning to look at him, for one brief second, I forgot I wasn’t the only one in the house. My life had been normal for the five minutes. I forgot while I was getting ready to go.
“Oh, um, I am heading to the gym. I need a run before I go to bed.” I grabbed my keys and pulled the door open.
“Give me a minute and I will go with you.” He said, tossing his phone on the table and headed for the stairs.
“No.” I said more aggressively than I intended. Boone almost recoiled at the word. “Sorry. Boone, I just need an hour of normal and if you’re at the gym, it won’t be. This is a lot and I just need.” My voice trailed off as I tried to compile my thoughts. “I don’t know what I need, but right now it’s not this.” I motioned between the two of us. He nodded, but I could see the hurt in his eyes. I wasn’t sure what he had been expecting. Did he think I would jump into his arms and beg him to take me to bed? I immediately felt warmth spread through me as I thought about taking him to bed. I needed to get out of the house. So I turned and walked out the door without another word.
My run was good, I had run ten kilometres faster than I ever had. Apparently, having your husband show up after eight years was good for a personal best time. I’d put my phone on, do not disturb, and was shocked by the amount of calls and texts when I switched it back on.
Leah: Hey need help hiding a body?
The text from her made me laugh, and I shook my head.
Me: Not yet, not done with the torture.
Leah: Let me know I’ve got the shovels.
Me: Thanks
Leah: Any time
Me: Leah, thanks for not being weird about this.
Leah: You’re my BFF and I like you more than I like him. You can’t choose family, but you can choose friends.
She was always there. I knew she would say the same thing to Boone, and that’s what I meant the world to me. Even though she talked a big game, she had always had Boone’s back, but somehow she could avoid choosing sides.
Walking to the car, my phone pinged and dinged, but I tossed it into my gym bag and threw it into my back seat. Nobody needed me that fast. Driving home, I felt like I slogged through the mud. My home for years had been my haven. I decorated it the way I wanted. It was welcoming and strictly me. Now it had been infiltrated again. Bursting out laughing, I realized that I had been all doom and gloom for the last four hours. My home was still the same. The only thing that changed was that Boone was in it. Which was a change, but I was feeling like the world was shifting back to right again.
“Hey, how was your run?” His voice rang through the house like it used to. If you had just walked in on this scene, you wouldn’t know there had been years separating us. Letting my bag fall to the floor, I kicked off my shoes and wandered around the house, trying to find him.
“Well, I suppose I need to get to bed. I have to be at the arena for practice tomorrow. Do you have time to drive me? My car will be there, so I don’t need to be picked up.” His voice trailed off. He hated relying on anyone, and that meant even me. Maybe if he had needed me more, I would have found a reason to stay around. That thought slapped me in the face.
“Of course I can. When is your first home game?” I asked, turning to face him.
“A couple days. The team just happened to have a week off between their away games and first home game, so it will be good. I have almost a week to learn their plays and get used to playing on a new line.” As confident as he sounded, I could see through it, and his nerves were starting to show. Any time he went to a new team, he pretended to be strong, but underneath he was a bundle of nervous energy, wondering if he would fit in or if he would just be the new old guy taking a spot on the roster.
Standing up, he grabbed the two suitcases that hadn’t made it upstairs as I turned off the television and lights. We walked up the stairs in silence and opened the door to our old bedroom. It was the same. I hadn’t changed anything. Our sleigh bed, that he argued with me about getting because “he wasn’t going to sleep in a crib”but somehow I convinced him it was romantic. The matching nightstands and lamps, and his alarm clock. He walked to the drawer and pulled it open. The hockey magazine he subscribed to and the book he had been reading all those years ago. It was silly, but until I knew there was something final, I couldn’t clean out his things.
Climbing in to bed, my hands itched to touch him, my body felt like it was calling out for him. “Goodnight,” I whispered.
“Night Gin. Tomorrow will be better.” I wanted to believe him, but I wondered if things would ever be better.
Boone tossed and turned after he crawled into bed. What are we thinking? He should have stayed with his parents. This was insane. “How do you sleep in a bed this small?” It was a queen bed, and not any different from the one we used to share, but back then we cuddled together and there was lots of room. Now the Grand Canyon wasn’t big enough to keep us apart.
Rolling over, I looked at him. “It’s been fine because I’m in it alone.” Turning away from him, I clicked off my light and listened to him chuckle.
“Well, you won’t be alone anymore,” he growled in my ear as rolled over so he faced my back and slapped my ass under the blankets, just like he used to when I was mad at him when we went to bed.
