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“I’ll wait for you to reach out to me,” I said, hating every word that came out of my mouth.
“Okay. Thanks.”
Once she was inside her apartment, I walked into mine, the high of winning ten games in a row forgotten.
I’d done everything I could to show Elle we were good for each other. Now I just had to see if she’d come to the same conclusion on her own.
CHAPTERTWENTY
Elle
I cringedas one of Ford’s teammates slammed into the boards at the Seattle arena and dropped to the ice. The crowd roared as the Seattle player got sent to the penalty box over it.
“Cheap hit,” Luke said, looking at what was left of my veggie lo mein. “You gonna eat that?”
“Have at it.” I passed it to him and curled up under a blanket on one end of the couch.
“What’s going on with you two?” he asked as he dug into the takeout container with his chopsticks.
I rested my head on the back of the couch and shrugged. “I don’t know. I really like him, but the hockey thing is hard for me. I told him I need a few days to think about things.”
He frowned at me. “You’re thinking about not seeing him anymore just because he’s a hockey player?”
“You know how I feel about hockey.”
“Based on what happened to me, which I don’t get. You’re being way too literal. The game will never be one-hundred-percent safe, but neither will driving to the grocery store or flying somewhere for vacation.”
I missed Ford. It had only been two days, and I missed his texts asking me how my day was going or telling me about something funny he’d seen.
“If you could go back in time, would you still play hockey?” I asked Luke.
“Yeah, I would. I know it sounds crazy, but hockey is part of who I am. I always heard about how bad head injuries could be, but it felt like something abstract that would never affect me. I’d still play, but I’d take the head injuries more seriously. I wouldn’t be the first guy to hit the other team every time.”
I shook my head, my mind already moving on to something else. “What happened with John was really hard on me.”
“John? You mean your last boyfriend? That douchebag with the earring?”
I nodded. “I never really told you how awful things got at the end. He was talking about marriage after just a few months, and about how he’d never want a prenup. Which was funny because he didn’t have anything.”
My brother nodded knowingly. “He wanted into the family for the money.”
“He wanted it more than anything. He became obsessed with it. And when I broke up with him, he refused to accept it.”
“Shit, I’m sorry.”
“I’ve never admitted this to anyone, but it got so bad that I told Gram and she hired a couple of security guys to tail me. He finally left me alone after they got up in his face a few times.”
Luke slurped a noodle into his mouth, grinning sheepishly. “Sorry. But what’s this have to do with Ford? He’s nothing like that. He’s got his own money.”
“I know, which makes my neurotic mind sure there’s somethingelsewrong with him. It’s hard to explain, but it’s hard for me to just be happy. I’m always questioning it and wondering how long it will last.”
“Why do you think that is?”
I shrugged. “I guess it’s just how I’m made.”
“That’s…no.” He set the takeout container on the coffee table and stood up. “I’m having an epiphany here. We’re both afraid to try hard things because we’re worried about failing. For me it’s rehab and for you it’s Ford.”
I wasn’tafraidof falling for Ford…was I? I just had a feeling he wouldn’t stay hot for his uptight, next-door neighbor indefinitely, and then I’d end up with a broken heart.
