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“You have to know that I would never betray you in any way, Callie. You’re my first real friend not in this world, which means you’re my first genuine friend. I wouldn’t allow anyone to break up that friendship. It means a lot to me.”
“I know. And I’m glad we’re friends, too. Antonio has just screwed with my head so much…” I paused as I saw Josh rolling his eyes next to me. “Hey, I should go, but I’ll see you soon, okay?”
“Okay,” Gia said happily. “Ciao.”
“Bye.” I hung up the phone and held it in my hands. “My friend is sleeping over tonight.”
“Figures,” Josh muttered, and I frowned.
“What’s your deal, Josh?”
“It’s just been a crazy night, and you’ve been flirting with everyone but me, and I’m just wondering what’s up.”
“Who was I flirting with?”
“That guy Troy, and Antonio, and then Jimmy.”
“Jimmy?” I burst out laughing. “What are you talking about?”
“I saw you following him and spying on him and getting all jealous when he was bumping and grinding with that hot redhead.”
“You thought she was hot?” I wrinkled my nose. “I thought she looked kinda trashy.”
“See? You were jealous.”
“Trust me when I say I was not jealous in the least. I couldn’t care less about Jimmy. Though he has seen me naked.” I shook my head as I laughed sarcastically. “Which sucks.”
“Why did he see you naked?” Josh’s voice rose in jealousy.
“It doesn’t matter.” I pressed my lips together. The last thing Josh needed to hear about was how Antonio had been fucking me from behind, and my breasts were bouncing, and Jimmy had gotten a show worthy of a porn star’s Oscar, whatever that would be called.
“You’re really not the girl I thought you were, Callie,” he said, shaking his head. “I thought you were this sweet, innocent bookworm, but you’re a freak, aren’t you?” He licked his lips. “They do say the quiet ones are the most daring and dangerous. Is that why you liked that douchebag? He represented a walk on the dark side to you?”
I knew I had to be concise and curt in my response to Josh. As much as I’d initially hoped we could be good friends, I could see that that wasn’t going to be possible. Josh was still a boy. Immature and childish. I didn’t want to deal with his attitude any more than I’d wanted to deal with Antonio. My brain throbbed as I thought of Antonio. That moment, when he’d been on his knees, his head pressed against me, it had felt surreal. It had felt intimate. I’d seen the real Antonio—one who didn’t know how to process his emotions. At least, that’s what the psychologist in me said. The saner part reminded me that I’d grown up thinking romance novels were true life, and my thoughts could have just been wishful thinking. I wanted to believe that I meant more to him than just a want for revenge. I wanted to believe I’d touched some part of his heart the way he had mine, but I didn’t want to be made a fool twice. I couldn’t handle that.
Silence filled the taxi as Josh turned away from me. Apparently, he now realized he was never getting in my pants again. My attraction to him felt like it was something that had occurred many moons ago. Now that I’d been with Antonio, well, a basic college guy could never compare.
“We’re here,” the driver said as he pulled over and pressed the meter. “That’ll be forty-two dollars, please.” I looked over at Josh, who held a twenty-dollar bill in his hand, and then gave me a look. I sighed as I reached for my wallet. I should have known he’d be a prick once he realized it was a definite no. I pulled out a twenty as well and handed it directly to the driver. I jumped out of the car and could hear the man cussing at Josh as he paid the rest. Not only was he not getting a tip, he wasn’t even getting the full fare, either.
I ran toward the building and punched in the code quickly so I could enter before Josh caught up with me. I didn’t want to talk to him again tonight. I knew if I did, I’d totally go off on him. And I didn’t want our friendship to end that way. It was over, as far as I was concerned, but I didn’t want to be mean. He didn’t deserve that.
I hurried to the elevator and closed my eyes as the doors closed. I felt overwhelmed and totally despondent. I wasn’t even sure how I’d gotten through the last twenty-four hours. How I’d survived and not broken down, given everything that had happened. I was definitely stronger than I’d ever imagined. The sad part was that it didn’t make me happy. I didn’t want to be strong. I didn’t want to develop a thick skin. I didn’t want to see the world in all its ugliness. There was something to be said about living life when you saw the positives in people. I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to trust someone now.
The elevator bell dinged, and I was grateful to finally head to my room. As I made my way down the corridor and saw people chatting and laughing, I suddenly wished I had my own apartment. I wished I lived alone. I wished I had a bathroom. A private bathtub that I could soak in. I’d pour in Epsom salts and oils and bubble bath, close my eyes, and imagine I was floating in the ocean. What I wouldn’t give to float in the water under the night sky. I’d stare up at the stars and talk to my mom. My heart ached as I realized I would have loved to have called her then. I would have loved to have her holding me in her arms, telling me it would all be okay. Telling me she loved me. Telling me she’d make everything all right. I stopped suddenly as I thought of Antonio and his mother. His mother had been stolen from him as a young boy. And it was all due to my dad. I thought about my own mom. What if the situation had been reversed? What if his dad and my mom had been having an affair? What if his dad had killed my mom? Would I have wanted revenge? Would I have done anything in my power? My head pounded as the answer came to me instantly.
“There you are, Callie.” Gia popped out of nowhere, wearing a cute red hoodie and skinny blue jeans. She gave me a quick hug and looked at me carefully. “Oh boy, you do look tired.”
“Thanks.” I laughed, rubbing my eyes. “Is that your way of telling me I look like shit?”
“You could never look like shit. You’re beautiful.” She grinned as we walked into my dorm room. I noted that Valentina’s bed was still the same. Not that I’d anticipated her coming back. I’d be shocked if she ever set foot in the building again.
“You’re too sweet, but I’m glad you’re here.” I yawned heavily, and I could feel my eyes drooping. “Though I’m sad to say I don’t think much of a conversation will be had tonight. I’m knackered.”
“That’s okay, doll. I’m tired as well.” She looked over at Valentina’s bed. “Should I sleep there or…?” She looked at my twin bed and frowned. “Not very big, is it?”
“No.” I laughed. “And as much as I love you, girl, I don’t need you all over me tonight.”
“Don’t worry.” She giggled. “I prefer my bedmates to be male.”
