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This was where I told her I failed - where I explained that I couldn’t find anything, and it was because of that that Patrick was doomed.
“I was trying to find a way out so Patrick wouldn’t have to endure servitude with them.”
There was no judgment in her gaze as she looked upon me, she simply nodded and stared at me with clarity.
“When I make my big move - myfinaleif you will, I will make sure that I take down a big enough part of them that Patrick will be spared.” I wanted to call bullshit - to tell her that making such promises was childish and wholly unbelievable; but the thing was, Ibelievedher.
I stared at her and spoke carefully, unsure how I was going to manage it, only that I had never wanted something more in my life. “I’m not giving you up. For as long as we can, you and I are doing this.”
Her smile was sad, not reaching her eyes as she pulled the muscles of her lips and cheeks, mimicking what happiness ought to look like but, still, she nodded, and her acceptance still felt like defeat. Because she had already decided how this would end - how she would end.
It was a strange thing, to mourn someone that was right next to me. I shook the morbid feelings from my mind. “Why did they name you Tekken?”
This time her grin was infectious, blooming across her face in a way that couldn’t be faked. “I grew up playing the game, and I’ve yet to meet someone I can’t beat.”
“Really?” I grinned, noting that I needed a Playstation in my own personal safehouse. Because I didn’t give a fuck what The Warden had to say, she and I were going to disappear for a few days - a few weeks, who even knew, because I didn’t want to be anywhere else.
“My turn,” she turned to face me, suddenly fully invested in this conversation. “Who gave you that black eye?”
I made the decision there and then that if we were doing this, I wouldn’t lie to her - not when she had been so starkly honest with me.
“Ajax and Josh ganged up on me. Ajax pulled my arms back from behind as Josh took a swing.”
She frowned, and without giving it much thought, I brought my lips to the creases on her forehead, kissing away her frustration. She leaned into me, and suddenly I didn’t want to let go because I was holding her, and kissing her, and there was a rightness to that.
“I brought ice-cream.” My mom’s voice echoed from the entrance as she and Da walked into the bar. I smiled as Marissa suddenly turned shy, ducking behind me as she attempted to avoid my parents. It was adorable how she thought that shit was going to fly around here. I threaded my fingers with hers and tugged her forward. “Ma this is Marissa, Marissa this my ma.” I pushed her forward into my mother’s embrace. Gillian Connolly was the type of woman that probably should have had a household full of kids - she was just naturally good with people, and after hearing Marissa’s tale, she could use more good people on her side. And just as I expected, my mother wrapped my hellcat in a hug and whispered loudly, “It’s so good tofinallymeet you.” Yeah, one look at me and my mother knew that I was harboring some serious heartache. Not that I’d ever confirm that shit with her, but such was the way of Gillian. Da stood behind them, looking on at all of us pleased as fucking punch, and yeah, he knew what was up at yesterday’s meeting.
“Let’s head upstairs and start preparing dinner.” My mother’s declaration was met with Marissa’s polite thanks as she attempted to turn her down, but she was quickly silenced by the Connolly clan. She would soon learn that the one with the loudest voice was the one who won in these parts.
It was something else having her seated at the family table, sharing jokes and stories with my parents. It was easy to love her, especially when she wasn’t guarded, and by the time our happiness was fueled by dessert and our joy a direct result of the wine we had consumed, Marissa regretfully announced that she had to leave.
“The contract.” I say the words softly, but everyone at the table hears me. “Give Da the contract, and tell him that we kept you here for hours going over it and Da is still considering some changes.”
Da doesn’t say anything - doesn’t contradict me.
“He won’t believe that.” My girl scoffs, but it doesn't matter because I will not leave her unprotected with that man.
“Does it matter? Call us on loudspeaker when you’re with him and we’ll confirm.”
She hesitates for a minute too long for my liking before finally nodding her agreement.
She had been on her own for too long, and while I knew it would take a while before she wouldtrustme automatically, it wouldn’t take her too long to realize that no matter what the stakes were, she was a Connolly now because she wasmine.
Da and I dragged out the contract signing, each day coming up with new clauses and phrases we wanted included. The Warden knew what we were doing, and for whatever reason, he was playing along. It meant he had another plan up his sleeve, and while the realization that we had enemies on all sides coming after us should have caused panic, I could only feelcalm.
I told Da what I needed, and I wasn't sure what he told The Warden, but I got to disappear with Marissa for a few days.
“Mack.” She spoke my name with a warning in her tone, and I didn’t think I would ever tire of hearing her like that - playful and seductive, I thrived on turning hernosintoyeses.
“Just follow me, okay? Put your feetexactlywhere mine go.” She nodded, apprehensive, but she listened. She was getting better at trusting me, andthatfelt like the ultimate prize.
Once more we found ourselves treading carefully up the fire escape of the building. We huddled on the small piece of landing on the top floor, a bright red door used for emergency escapes beckoned us forward. I pulled the ladder up, ensuring that no one other than us could get up here, and then I pushed the door open.
She didn’t gush, or coo. She was silent in her perusal as she looked over one of our safe houses - the one I had claimed for myself. It wasn’t a place I brought people to, choosing to use it as an escape rather than a retreat. The entire place was open plan, a large gray couch took up the center of the room, placed directly in front of a giant TV with a Playstation. She flashed me a grin, her palm skimming the top of the kitchen counter as she walked backwards, heading towards the couch that also folded out into a bed. The only room that was separate to this area was the bathroom. There wasn’t space in there for both a shower and a bath, and so I settled on a claw-footed tub that I knew Marissa would use. But she wasn’t looking at the tub. She was looking at me as she began to pop the buttons of her shirt, the flannel plaid falling open, onlyjustcovering her nipples.
My mouth was dry as I stared upon her. It had been too long since I’d had her like that. “No bra?”
“I figured we’d be naked most of the time here, so it seemed pointless.”
