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Friday rolled around just the same way that it did every week. I couldn’t remember a time when I was truly enthusiastic about the end of the week - because, to others, the day might signal some level of freedom, for me, it simply indicated that Imightget laid - depending on what Society bitch was on the menu.
But I couldn’t stomach going down to the bar today. Holly was off fucking Paul, and I wasn’t quite sure where the others were - not that I looked very hard.Before I did anything for myself - stole a sliver of time away from these godforsaken people, I had a phonecall to make. As I pressed the phone against my ear I exhaled, steeling myself for the conversation ahead - for the [erson I needed to become, even if it was for a total of five minutes. The many masks I donned in a day had an exhausting effect on a person and I almost couldn’t wait for this to beover- for this toend.
“O’Grady.” Nats smooth polished voice echoed down the line.
“Nats, baby, you’re a difficult woman to get hold of.” I flirted down the line even if every word I spoke was utter bullshit. Natalia Mable was the most solid person I knew.
“Stop flirting with me and give me your news.” her tone was curt - snappish, but then she’d always been like that when it came to flirting. She was loyal to a fault, only this time I didn’t seem to mind because the man she was loyal to didn’t belong to the Society. Fuck knew how she planned on keeping him - maybe that’s where her motivation lay to overthrow this place. In the end I found that it didn’t matter.
“Thought you might be interested to know that your friend Raquel is shacking up with Joshua Penn.” I allowed the weight of my statement to hang between us. Raqs may deny it, but I saw the way she’d looked at Joshua - had noted the way her gaze sought him out when she thought that no one else was looking. Nats simply hummed by way of reply and her aloofness irritated the fuck out of me. Here we were, with our necks on the line while she was yachting it up with her boyfriend. I reigned my temper in, forcing myself to exhale the illusion of calmness into the conversation at hand.
“Is she joining the breeding program?” Her voice was all fucking business and something about her change of tone eased the tension thrumming in my system, because shewastaking this seriously.
“I wouldn’t know, babydoll, you know that I’m a lowlife here who knows nothing.” I teased the words down the line, hating the way they rang true.
“I know you’re full of shit O’Grady,” Nats snorted back at me.
“Look, thanks for letting me knowm they’re probably housing them together to try andforcethe breeding program on them both.”
I whistled my agreement, knowing full well that Nats was probably right, but if Raquel managed to ensare him… it was almost too good to imagine.
“If you manage to turn Josh Penn, he’d be a powerful ally to have.” I allowed the truth of my statement to hang between us, but Nats was quick to shut it down. “Show me a man more enthralled in The Society and I’ll hand over my inheritance.”
Paul Mae came to mind, but instead of voicing my opinion I held my tongue, because what we were doing was risky, and I wasn’t about to show all my cards. Although if there was a way to eliminate that fuck in the process I wouldn’t be distraught.
I disconnected the call before moving forward with my evening plans.
My boots hit each metal stair, echoing throughout the air, not that it mattered - no one would be out here on a friday night. The rooftop above the library was almost always empty. The rich were busy getting shitfaced and the other servants were content to salivate for the scraps any of those assholes deigned to offer us, but I wasn’t in the mood for all that bullshit today.
Instead, I needed to think - I needed a minute tomyself- time that belonged to no one else but me. Shit like that was priceless, which is how I found myself coming out here again and again. The roof wasn’t anything special, in fact, it didn’t even particularly hold a good view, but there was enough space up here to pace and swing my arms if I wanted to, and if I squinted up at the sky, I could almost imagine the stars that existed there, hidden from view on account of all the city lights.
I didn’t remember a lot from my childhood, but I remembered the stars. They were a constant, even when I couldn’t see them.
An old wooden porch that seemed to sink under the weight of the air itself. One step was broken, splinters and rot sticking through. It meant that each time we wanted to get in and out the house, we had to hop over. Imanagedjust fine, and if Gemma wanted out, then I helped her, too. Mama was sprawled across thesunken porch,sleeping. She did that often - mostly during the day, only, this time, it was night. The stars were out. Gemma was fast asleep, and I was… restless. I stepped across the wooden porch, the rotting beams groaning beneath my broken sneakers, and I expertly hopped over the broken step. Because, here, the stars were blinding.
This is what I did every night. Once Gemma was tucked in bed, and mama was usually out somewhere, I came here to sit on the yellow lawn and look at the stars.
I scanned the house next to us - old man Hugh. He lived alone with his electricity more off than on - like us. But, sometimes, when he got lucky on those scratch lottery tickets of his, he gave me a chocolate - which I shared with Gemma. Those were the best days because they showed me that there was so much more to life than what mama cobbled together.
The dry lawn prickled against my legs, my shorts were quickly becoming too small, but I didn’t want to ask mama for anything, I’d make a trip to town - take Gemma with me, and ask for help. Sometimes the church down there had some extra clothes for kids. Gemma could use a new dress, too.
I sat like that for a long time beneath the stars, accounting for all the things I needed to get for Gemma and I. We still had three slices of bread left, which meant that tomorrow we could still eat, but I would have to make a plan for the rest of the week. Maybe old man Hugh had some canned food he no longer wanted…
Headlights belonging to a dark SUVbroachedthe treeline. I knew what car it was - they had been visiting regularly, only they weren’t one of mama’s friends, they simply sat there and watched.
It was weird. Didn’t they get bored there? There was nothing to see here except three old dilapidated houses.
The sound of mama’s soft snores filled the air. I was tired, but while the car sat in the treeline, I couldn’t tear myself away - couldn’t make myself go to bed.
The sound of a car door closing jolted me into high alert because that sound was unusual. They normally never got out of the car - they just sat there and watched. I watched as a woman walked through the treeline. She appeared official looking, with some sort of skirt suit. Her brownhairframed her face neatly. She was… clean. The woman made a beeline straight for me, and I couldn’t bring myself to move. I was curious about her - curious and annoyed because she was walking across our lawn. She better not wake Gemma.
“Hi, there.” Her voice was soft - gentle. It reminded me of the way mama sometimes spoke to her friends when she asked them for her medicine.
I glared at the woman, unwilling to greet a stranger. A stranger who stood on my lawn.
Mylackluster demeanordidn’t seem to deter her, and the woman before me suddenly sat down next to me. That was how I found myself blanketed by the stars with a complete stranger.
She smelled nice, though - kind of like those vanilla cakes Mrs. Heeray baked for the church. “The stars are pretty tonight.” The woman went on, talking as if I had replied - as if we were friends.
